Why would anyone want to make or see this movie?

98. "Entrapment"
It's the one where Catherine Zeta Jones slowly manuevers around the lazers in the museum. The one with the butt shot. It's not good. It's really predictable and a lot of Sean Connery's lines are laughable, like, "Time for another adventure."

I have to stop watching bad films before working at the Brain. Just because it's on and I'm eating dinner doesn't mean I should sit through it.

In a time before youtube

46. Billy Frolick "What I Really Want to Do Is Direct: Seven Film School Graduates Go to Hollywood"
My mother bought me this book while I was in junior high. She knew I wanted to direct films. I told her I only wanted to direct films that I wrote and the seven people in this book wanted to direct films written by them or anyone else and I didn't care to move to Hollywood. If Kevin Smith could make a film for under $30,000, why would I want to go to film school for $30,000 a year? I could make my own. I still kind of feel that way. Due to advances in cameras and editing technology, you can make a film for less than $30,000 and have it look good. Look at something like "Conversations with Other Women," a film shot in 12 days and edited on Final Cut Pro. I'd rather make a film like that than try to get into a studio system. I'm missing the point. The book isn't about that and doesn't say it is. It's about seven film school graduates from the early 1990s trying to break in in the mid 90s.

The seven graduates have different goals. One aspires to direct animated features. One does documentaries. One wants to focus on women's issues. One on gay issues. It seems that Frolick got one stereotypical film student from each different film school stereotype and tracked them for three years. It's difficult to care about any of them. All of them fail in one way or another. They all learn the lesson that Hollywood is a hard luck town and blah blah blah.

Yes we can

97. "Christmas on Mars"
I've been waiting to see this film since I heard about in 2003. Five years later, it has been released on DVD. I probably like it more that I had to wait.

The film is similar to the work of Ed Wood. It doesn't make much sense, the dialogue is extremely spares, most of the actors aren't professionals and it's obvious that we're in Oklahoma and not on Mars. So what? It's a film and supposed to be entertaining. It kind of is. It does drag. It's easy to lose track of what's going on. The black and white film doesn't help much either. So what? (As you can see, I really want to like this film) The cinematography is quite good and the B&W film makes 'space' seem colder. Like most B films, there is a lot of room for improvement.

The film was shot between 02 and 05. In that time period the lead actor, Lips multi-instrumentalist Steven Drozd was on and off heroin. It's clear that in some shots he's using. His weight easily fluctuates 20 pounds. Knowing this made the film easier to like. Coyne and Co. obviously had to work through this with their friend. They obviously made this as a labor of love. It's much easier to appreciate it when you know about the struggle.

The score can be deafening. It's wonderful, especially when it wanders into "Transmissions from the Satellite Heart" type stuff. The shots that use color have the same power as early Lips videos, which is a good thing.

If you are a casual B film or Sci-Fi fan, you won't dig this film. If you're a Flaming Lips devote that knows the story behind this, you will be glad you saw/bought this package. If you're in the mood to be inspired to make your own art, you can never go wrong with The Flaming Lips.

It's up

The podcast is now available for download on iTunes. Visit youmethemeverybody.com for a direct link to subscribe. If you don't want to do that, open iTunes and just search for, "you, me, them, everybody". The first five episodes are available for free download. Please do this. Please tell everyone you know. Please tell people that want to advertise in the wonderful world of podcasting.

Thanks to Kevin for the wonderful logo and site help. Thanks to Daniel for the wonderful songs.

Literal bulldog(s)

Purple Line Express

I ride the train for work. On Friday I spotted a bug. It reminded me of a Fetor demo. Here's the video.

I'd watch it again if they had a money ticker on the screen

96. "Armageddon"
Other: Brandon, haven't you seen this before?
Me: No. I avoided it when I came out in '98.
Other: So, why did you decide to watch it ten years later?
Me: I was bored at 1am.
Other: You stayed up til 1 to watch this flick?
Me: No, it started at 1. I stayed up til 4.
Other: 4am?
Me: Yea.
Other: Why?
Me: I wanted to look at money for three hours.
Other: What are you talking about?
Me: It's a Michael Bay movie. Every Bay movie looks like money.
Other: Do you know how much it cost?
Me: It cost $140 million to make and grossed over a half a billion dollars.
Other: Why do you know this?
Me: Because I know how to use a search engine.
Other: What did you think of the movie?
Me: I thought it was awful in every way.
Other: So why did you watch it?
Me: Because I couldn't stop thinking about the cast. Billy Bob Thorton got the part because of a small film he made called "Sling Blade". Ben Affleck got the part due to Kevin Smith flicks. Owen Wilson was cast because of "Bottle Rocket". It's like Michael Bay cherry picked every actor with a sliver of credibility and made them rich.
Other: But you could've came to that conclusion by looking up the cast list.
Me: You're right.
Other: Were you drinking?
Me: Not a drop of alcohol.
Other: Were you medicated?
Me: Not in any way.
Other: Suicidal?
Me: Nope.
Other: I'm confused.
Me: So am I.

Possible Bible

45. Nelson Algren "Nonconformity"
This essay is under one hundred pages. I bookmarked about half of it. Algren's writing about writing is, thus far, the best writing on writing I've ever read.

You can read this in about an hour. I took a little over two weeks. I re-read passages, recommended passages to friends and stretched out the first read as long as I possibly could.

Buy this book. It's under $3 on Amazon.

Dentistry? I can't even believe that's something that's real.

95. "The Foot Fist Way"
I think I saw my favorite comedy of 2008 (the film premiered in 2006 but was released in a few theaters by a major distributor in May of this year). Danny McBride stars as a Taekwondo instructor. He kicks ass. He swears at children. He drives a muscle car and has an awesome mustache.

It's funnier than "Napoleon Dynamite". Since it looks like said film and was also picked up by MTV Films, the comparison has been mentioned quite a bit. While "Napoleon" was a safe and awkward film, this one is raunchy and for a select audience. It reminds me of when Will Ferrell guests on Letterman and no one knows what's going on.

I love this film. I want every comedy to be like this film.

Disco Disco

94. "You Don't Mess with the Zohan"
I rented this movie because...
-I remember thinking it couldn't be as bad as it looked
-Judd Apatow co-wrote the script
-Mariah Carey shirts are funny
-It was a free rental
-I heard it dealt with the Israeli/Palestinian conflict in a funny way

It was disappointing. I knew it would be disappointing, but...There is no excuse for my behavior.

From the canon

44. F. Scott Fitzgerald "The Great Gatsby"
I haven't read this book for eleven years. I forgot most of what happened. I picked it up because a few newscasters said it was worth rereading due to the current financial crisis. I'm glad I reread this classic.

Since I first read the work I thought of Gatsby as Puffy. I no longer think so. Since reading more of Algren, I think of Gatsby/Fitzgerald in the same way I think of all great authors, someone that could never be satisfied, someone forced into writing, never able to escape it.

Reread this book. I'd like to have a friend I could talk to about books published in 1925.

Dos

93. "For a Few Dollars More"
The Man with No Name has a partner in the second installment of the trilogy. Eastwood plays more of a supporting role to the new man in black, an older gun for hire. Both characters lend to each other, making something already badass really badass.

The introduction isn't as neat as "A Fistful of Dollars" but the story is slightly more complex, there's more character development and the score by Morricone is just as good. Highly recommended.

The last one?

Studs Terkel passed away this afternoon at the age of 96. I almost met the writer twice in the last two years. He was conducting an interview at Standard Indian Buffet on Belmont in Lakeview. I whispered to Kelsey, "Is that Studs Terkel?" She thought so. I went to the bookstore two doors down, bought two of the man's books and hurried back. By the time I returned he was gone. Earlier this year he signed copies of his new book. In order to get an autograph and praise the man in person, you needed to buy the book from the museum for $30. I didn't have $30. I went home.

I've been reading Studs Terkel's work for the last seven years. I'll pick up "Working" or "Division Street" when I visit my mother in the suburbs. My current bedside reading is "And They All Sang: Adventures of an Eclectic Disc Jockey". I recently started a podcast inspired by Studs show on WFMT. I'm reading Nelson Algren books because Mr. Terkel made sure the controversial, legendary authors out-of-print books (all of them) would remain in print since the late 90s. I've been trying to get a hold of Terkel's television show "Stud's Place" since I learned about it at the Chicago History Museum. The man has done everything I'd like to do, did it well and didn't buckle during McCarthyism. I can't think of a better writer to look up to.

Terkel connected Hemingway to Algren and beyond. The man interviewed some of the most important musicians of the 20th century. He conducted interviews with the common man and made it clear that everyone has a story.

If any of my friends would like to read Terkel's books, send me an email and I'll gladly lend you mine.

logo

by Kevin McGuire

If "Slacker" or "Clerks" influenced you

43. John Pierson "Spike, Mike, Slackers, & Dykes: A Guided Tour Across a Decade of American Independent Cinema"
I began this book in 1997. I was 14 years old and wanted to direct films. I loved "Clerks" and "Roger & Me" and this book covered both. I read the chapters about each film but couldn't really enjoy anything else. 11 years later I was able to comprehend it a little better.

If you're not interested in independent American cinema from the 1980s and have no desire to make a film, this book is not for you. It's numbers heavy, name drops films and filmmakers you've probably never heard of and isn't a great story. It's definitly interesting, but not a great narrative. Pierson writes for aspiring filmmakers from the mid 90s. The info about how to edit a picture in your bedroom probably is different now due to advances in cameras and computers. I couldn't help but think of "Conversations with Other Women" during these parts.

It's difficult to find much information about Pierson's current work online. It would be nice to see what he thinks of current filmmaking.

The man as scum

92. "A Fistful of Dollars"
Clint Eastwood is the Man with No Name. He looks out for few, makes money off everyone and has the best shot in town. You can trust him but you won't figure out the angle until it's too late. He's the disease that might make the plague disappear. He is the ultimate bad-ass.

Sergio Leone helped recreate the Western with the first of his "Dollars Trilogy". Yea, he was sued successfully by Kurosawa's for ripping off his film "Yojimbo", but it doesn't matter. It's like saying "Clerks" is a remake of "Slackers". Both films are hugely important. Both films tell similar stories. Only one film has Eastwood.

The score by Ennio Morricone is a classic for a reason. It's haunting, memorable and fun (that is possible).

The dialogue doesn't sync because most of the cast spoke Italian. It's distracting. After 30 minutes you get used to it. By this point in the film, it's about Eastwood staring ahead, thinking who to kill next.

With Jack Lemmon

91. "Bell, Book and Candle"
Thanks to the wonderful MeTV station in Chicago, us non-cable viewers get a chance to watch "classic" films at odd hours any day of the week. Since it's the season of scary films, this James Stewart and Kim Novak flick was pretty great for the first half and not so bad for the second.

It's difficult not to enjoy the duo. Sure, the film isn't scary and definitely not a comedy (though it was nominated for the Golden Globes Best Picture - Comedy in 1958) and doesn't really go anywhere, but the performances are great. Not a bad way to waste a Saturday.

Kick 'em out

90. "Chicago 10: Speak Your Piece"
You might enjoy this partially animated documentary more if you have no idea about the 1968 DNC protests. If you live in Chicago and have a basic understanding of the Chicago machine, Daley 1 or the DNC, you'll probably already have an opinion on what happened.

Teenagers would love this film, especially ones that are into Rage Against the Machine. Film maker Brett Morgen liberally uses hard rockin' hits from the 90s to make all the cop/protester encounters seem like video game explosions. The computer animation makes the court room seem like the best theater you're not allowed to attend. Wherever you stand, this documentary looks and sounds excellent.

Sloppy Joe

Guns N' Roses released the title track single to "Chine Democracy" this morning. You can listen to it here.

I think Axl sounds like Adam Sandler when he sings "Lunch Lady Land". It doesn't help that at around 1:50 Axl sings about "Chinese stew".

Cute

89. "Eagle Vs. Shark"
Equal parts "Napoleon Dynamite" and "Me and You and Everyone We Know", this New Zealand based film is wonderful for people that are alone, read a lot, think they're smarter than everyone but are miserable and those that enjoy stop motion animation. It's good.

Lily works at a burger joint. She has a crush on the guy that comes in. His name is Jarrod. Lily works on an order for Jarrod on her last day at work. He gives her an invitation to pass along. She does. She ends up going to a party Jarrod is hosting. Guests dress up as their favorite animal. Lily goes as an eagle. Mark is a shark. There is a fighting game tournament. Jarrod wins. Lily lets him. They two begin dating. It's awkward. Quietly awkward. Lily and Jarrod go to his hometown so he can settle a score with the guy that bullied him in high school. That trip is also awkward.

A great film for a kid that's lonely in high school. If I find out any of my friends looooove this film I will worry that they are suicidal.