The phrase "we'll see" makes me upset every time I hear it. It reminds me of what it was like to be a child and asking an adult to do something that they did not really want to do.
"Can we get ice cream after we run the errands?"
"We'll see."
I hated hearing that even as a child. Now that I'm technically an adult I want to break a chair over whoever utters those words to me.
"How's the job going?"
"It's pretty stressful. I'm not sure if I want to be there. I might leave. We'll see."
No, we won't see. We won't see because if you keep saying "we'll see" I'm going to hurt you and cut all ties.
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Monday, December 26, 2005
Better Living Through Technology
I'm pretty sure the CD drive on the laptop I'm using is broke. The thing is brand new. The CD drive in the computer that's almost 8-years old works perfectly fine. I guess things were better back in the day.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Grindstone
The Machine is actually making progress! Hooray! All in the land of gears is celebrating.
The Electric Six album that comes out in Feb. is very good. Full of dance music, lyrics that don't make sense or have a point and a tour that stops at Double Door makes me like the band.
If all goes as planned, The Machine will give you at least four things per month to attend. Two or more bars where we DJ, a few bands and maybe a party.
A band is practicing downstairs. It sounds like static, a jackhammer and an Iron Maiden 33 played at 45 speed on a Fischer Price record player. They are also smoking weed. I know this because the office smells like weed. I do not smoke. The scent is coming from the vents.
The Electric Six album that comes out in Feb. is very good. Full of dance music, lyrics that don't make sense or have a point and a tour that stops at Double Door makes me like the band.
If all goes as planned, The Machine will give you at least four things per month to attend. Two or more bars where we DJ, a few bands and maybe a party.
A band is practicing downstairs. It sounds like static, a jackhammer and an Iron Maiden 33 played at 45 speed on a Fischer Price record player. They are also smoking weed. I know this because the office smells like weed. I do not smoke. The scent is coming from the vents.
Friday, December 16, 2005
God damn
I did not get the job. There is no progress to report for The Machine. I did drink from 6 pm to 3 am. All but one drink was free. I guess that's good.
I'm depressing you. Fuck off. Go read pitchfork or livejournal or something.
I'm depressing you. Fuck off. Go read pitchfork or livejournal or something.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Monday, December 05, 2005
Saturday's All-Right For Fighting
People need to have snow ball fights. It's good for the soul.
After spending the last 24-hours within a 2-block radius, I needed to go out. I was scheduled to review a show at SubT on Friday night but couldn't due to an extremely painful tooth pain. I was scheduled to read at a monthly event at Mojoe's but didn't due to poor scheduling. I sat around all day with no plans to leave. Around 6 p.m., I decided to get the hell out of Oak Park. Since I hadn't showered in a few days and smelled like smoke, fat and Krispy Kreme doughnuts, I figured I should wash up. So I did. I got on the el around 8 p.m. and got to Mojoe's during the last reading. Oh well. I would have read to the same 8 people I always read to.
Chicago hasn't been hit hard by snow, but today was pretty bad. Since it's been a light season, the snow tonight was great. It was a steady stream but not enough to make driving or walking that difficult. There was enough snow to make the city look like a dream but not enough to keep people indoors.
Following the reading was a trip to a nearby Mexican restaurant. Eight of us sat at a table. Some tattooed, some with facial hairs, some with glasses, some Vegans, some carnivores. A typical mix of "zinesters." Since the person I was expecting to see wasn't there, I asked Lab Rat if I could tag along with him. He said fine. I had something to do.
Jeff has a car. So the three of us drove. Our first destination was a party on the edge of Boystown. It was not a good party. The place was packed with people that are usually at Lincoln Park parties. People that really don't care what music is on, well dressed, clean, in shape, made up in make up, etc. The kind of people that usually don't enjoy the company of Lab Rat, Jeff and me. A little unkempt is better. So we left. Though I invested $5 for a cup at the party and definitely did not get my money's work of beer, it was imperative that we leave. When Lab Rat told me the news, I went to the bathroom. I made my money back in dental floss and hair dye/hair gel. I got my money's worth.
In the alley on the way to the party was a computer monitor. I tried to smash it. I did smash it. I also fell. It was not as glorious as I had hoped.
The second and final party was in Bucktown. The place was about a fifth of the size as the first apartment. The stairs were uneven, the floor slanted and 3-people lived in a place the size of a normal studio apartment. It didn't matter. The party was great. Only 20 or so people were there. It didn't matter. 5 girls, 10-15 guys. It didn't matter. People danced, everyone had a snow-ball fight, there was enough alcohol and no one was trying to impress anyone else. Jeff blew a small ball of fire. Lab Rat tried to. It did not happen. To compensate for his failure he put some cap gun ammo on the stove.
Around 3 a.m., the Lab Rat, Jeff and I left to smoke a hookah. Lab Rat and Jeff fucked around on a keyboard, I played some weird 3-string instrument and Lab Rat free styled over some fucked up beats. It's a good time to note that Lab Rat had the most to drink. It was a good time.
Thanks to Jeff for driving me home. Much appreciated.
It was a good night. I visited two places I'll probably never see again, met some interesting people, got some more dental floss and saw people I don't see enough. Now I'm watching "Sealab 2021" and writing this little memory. It wasn't an exciting night, but one that I enjoyed. I played in a snowball fight on someone’s roof in Bucktown. I danced with no one in particular. I drank enough to maintain a buzz and only spent $5. It was a pretty good night.
After spending the last 24-hours within a 2-block radius, I needed to go out. I was scheduled to review a show at SubT on Friday night but couldn't due to an extremely painful tooth pain. I was scheduled to read at a monthly event at Mojoe's but didn't due to poor scheduling. I sat around all day with no plans to leave. Around 6 p.m., I decided to get the hell out of Oak Park. Since I hadn't showered in a few days and smelled like smoke, fat and Krispy Kreme doughnuts, I figured I should wash up. So I did. I got on the el around 8 p.m. and got to Mojoe's during the last reading. Oh well. I would have read to the same 8 people I always read to.
Chicago hasn't been hit hard by snow, but today was pretty bad. Since it's been a light season, the snow tonight was great. It was a steady stream but not enough to make driving or walking that difficult. There was enough snow to make the city look like a dream but not enough to keep people indoors.
Following the reading was a trip to a nearby Mexican restaurant. Eight of us sat at a table. Some tattooed, some with facial hairs, some with glasses, some Vegans, some carnivores. A typical mix of "zinesters." Since the person I was expecting to see wasn't there, I asked Lab Rat if I could tag along with him. He said fine. I had something to do.
Jeff has a car. So the three of us drove. Our first destination was a party on the edge of Boystown. It was not a good party. The place was packed with people that are usually at Lincoln Park parties. People that really don't care what music is on, well dressed, clean, in shape, made up in make up, etc. The kind of people that usually don't enjoy the company of Lab Rat, Jeff and me. A little unkempt is better. So we left. Though I invested $5 for a cup at the party and definitely did not get my money's work of beer, it was imperative that we leave. When Lab Rat told me the news, I went to the bathroom. I made my money back in dental floss and hair dye/hair gel. I got my money's worth.
In the alley on the way to the party was a computer monitor. I tried to smash it. I did smash it. I also fell. It was not as glorious as I had hoped.
The second and final party was in Bucktown. The place was about a fifth of the size as the first apartment. The stairs were uneven, the floor slanted and 3-people lived in a place the size of a normal studio apartment. It didn't matter. The party was great. Only 20 or so people were there. It didn't matter. 5 girls, 10-15 guys. It didn't matter. People danced, everyone had a snow-ball fight, there was enough alcohol and no one was trying to impress anyone else. Jeff blew a small ball of fire. Lab Rat tried to. It did not happen. To compensate for his failure he put some cap gun ammo on the stove.
Around 3 a.m., the Lab Rat, Jeff and I left to smoke a hookah. Lab Rat and Jeff fucked around on a keyboard, I played some weird 3-string instrument and Lab Rat free styled over some fucked up beats. It's a good time to note that Lab Rat had the most to drink. It was a good time.
Thanks to Jeff for driving me home. Much appreciated.
It was a good night. I visited two places I'll probably never see again, met some interesting people, got some more dental floss and saw people I don't see enough. Now I'm watching "Sealab 2021" and writing this little memory. It wasn't an exciting night, but one that I enjoyed. I played in a snowball fight on someone’s roof in Bucktown. I danced with no one in particular. I drank enough to maintain a buzz and only spent $5. It was a pretty good night.
What I Would Have Read Aloud
The following is what I was going to read at Mojoe's on December 3 2005.
The title is "Dear America."
-I was 5-feet behind three late-20-something females on the way to the el. One would turn her head every five seconds or so. After two blocks, the three stopped to look at an Italian restaurant's menu. They were scared of me. They were not scared to talk to a homeless guy when we shared the same el car.
-Tool makes me wish for the apocalypse.
-People that write to the op-ed section of newspapers should not begin their letter with, "Dear American, I'm fed up..."
-I spent the day listing my top 100 albums, videos and artists of all-time for no reason.
-50 Cent needs to go away. Not die, but release a string of albums that no one buys.
-It sucks that a kid died because he was sledding directly into traffic. It's not a tragedy that the drive of the pickup truck did not stop. It sucks but the kid was asking for it. It's really going to suck on Monday when some paper prints, "Dear America, It's a tragedy that the guy driving that pickup didn't stop."
-I find Kelly Clarkson more attractive with each passing day.
-I have a hole in my tooth that's been bothering me. Yesterday was really bad. I spent an hour and a half trying to pull it out with gloves (I couldn't get a grip without them). Then I spent an hour trying to get it out with a wrench. That didn't work.
-The Kedzie green line stop is my favorite el stop. They let me in after my card wouldn't read. The State/Lake, Clark/Lake, Clinton, Ashland and California stops wouldn't.
-Aborting drug babies isn't going against god. Having drug babies is doing the devil's work.
-If my mom really believes all Jewish people are rich, why didn't she baptize me Jewish?
-I want to have ball cancer, have the cancer ball taken out and recover. No problems, just one ball instead of two. Then I would have a license to kill. And not just kill brown people, but all people. No male jury would convict the guy that had ball cancer.
-If you're riding the el with a friend and the car is crowded, sit with said friend. Don't wear your IPod and talk to each other across the aisle. It makes me want to write a "Dear America" op-ed piece.
-The German language just sounds evil.
-When things are really grim, I take NyQuil.
-I want to marry Rachel Weisz, have an affair with Kelly Clarkson and have David Bowie stalk me. Then, I want Kanye West and Jon Brion to produce the David Bowie album that is about stalking me. Bowie and Clarkson would do a duet and Rachel Weisz would be on the album's cover.
If this happens, 6 months later I'll get ball cancer. Weisz will divorce me, Clarkson won't see me and Bowie will get bored of me so I'll all of them. After being acquitted, I'll publish a book called "Dear America." It'll be a picture book with German captions.
-Chimichanga is a fun word to say.
-Why would anyone buy a commemorative jacket? I.E. "Super Bowl XXVIII"
-My goal as a father is to never have a daughter that refers to her as a cum-bucket, cum-dumpster or any other receptacle prefaced with the word cum.
-Every time I get on a new el car, I look around and decide who will be my lifelong companion if we crash and are trapped for the rest of eternity. I think I found someone on this car. Wait. No. She's reading "People."
The title is "Dear America."
-I was 5-feet behind three late-20-something females on the way to the el. One would turn her head every five seconds or so. After two blocks, the three stopped to look at an Italian restaurant's menu. They were scared of me. They were not scared to talk to a homeless guy when we shared the same el car.
-Tool makes me wish for the apocalypse.
-People that write to the op-ed section of newspapers should not begin their letter with, "Dear American, I'm fed up..."
-I spent the day listing my top 100 albums, videos and artists of all-time for no reason.
-50 Cent needs to go away. Not die, but release a string of albums that no one buys.
-It sucks that a kid died because he was sledding directly into traffic. It's not a tragedy that the drive of the pickup truck did not stop. It sucks but the kid was asking for it. It's really going to suck on Monday when some paper prints, "Dear America, It's a tragedy that the guy driving that pickup didn't stop."
-I find Kelly Clarkson more attractive with each passing day.
-I have a hole in my tooth that's been bothering me. Yesterday was really bad. I spent an hour and a half trying to pull it out with gloves (I couldn't get a grip without them). Then I spent an hour trying to get it out with a wrench. That didn't work.
-The Kedzie green line stop is my favorite el stop. They let me in after my card wouldn't read. The State/Lake, Clark/Lake, Clinton, Ashland and California stops wouldn't.
-Aborting drug babies isn't going against god. Having drug babies is doing the devil's work.
-If my mom really believes all Jewish people are rich, why didn't she baptize me Jewish?
-I want to have ball cancer, have the cancer ball taken out and recover. No problems, just one ball instead of two. Then I would have a license to kill. And not just kill brown people, but all people. No male jury would convict the guy that had ball cancer.
-If you're riding the el with a friend and the car is crowded, sit with said friend. Don't wear your IPod and talk to each other across the aisle. It makes me want to write a "Dear America" op-ed piece.
-The German language just sounds evil.
-When things are really grim, I take NyQuil.
-I want to marry Rachel Weisz, have an affair with Kelly Clarkson and have David Bowie stalk me. Then, I want Kanye West and Jon Brion to produce the David Bowie album that is about stalking me. Bowie and Clarkson would do a duet and Rachel Weisz would be on the album's cover.
If this happens, 6 months later I'll get ball cancer. Weisz will divorce me, Clarkson won't see me and Bowie will get bored of me so I'll all of them. After being acquitted, I'll publish a book called "Dear America." It'll be a picture book with German captions.
-Chimichanga is a fun word to say.
-Why would anyone buy a commemorative jacket? I.E. "Super Bowl XXVIII"
-My goal as a father is to never have a daughter that refers to her as a cum-bucket, cum-dumpster or any other receptacle prefaced with the word cum.
-Every time I get on a new el car, I look around and decide who will be my lifelong companion if we crash and are trapped for the rest of eternity. I think I found someone on this car. Wait. No. She's reading "People."
Monday, November 28, 2005
Early
It's not 11 p.m. and I'm very tired. This is no good.
Instead of doing work, I'm doing nothing. At least I used to make to-do lists. I haven't done that in a few weeks.
I'll start one tomorrow.
Wait, since I just typed that, isn't that in it of itself a to-do list?
It is. At least I think it is.
Instead of doing work, I'm doing nothing. At least I used to make to-do lists. I haven't done that in a few weeks.
I'll start one tomorrow.
Wait, since I just typed that, isn't that in it of itself a to-do list?
It is. At least I think it is.
Thanks
To everyone that came to the Bottle last night. It was fun.
Staring at a computer screen everyday at work doesn't make me want to update this thing as much as I should.
Staring at a computer screen everyday at work doesn't make me want to update this thing as much as I should.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Funny
The story about the two guys that escaped from prison and posed as Katrina victims is funny. It sucks for the real victims, but it's still funny.
Thursday, November 17, 2005
I really have nothing to say
Issue 2 should be online by the beginning of next week. That’s good.
I’ll be DJing at Liar’s Club on December 1, my birthday. Please come. Please do not buy me a drink. I get them for free.
It seems that when I type the word where, the second e usually ends up capitalized. Weird? I don’t know. Insignificant? Yes.
I bought two masks today. One is a snow owl, one is for a mental hospital patient that likes to eat faces. FUN TIMES U.S.A!!!
I’m listening to the new Wilco live album. I’m not sure how I feel about it. It’s kind of boring, but I expected it to be kind of boring.
I’ll be DJing at Liar’s Club on December 1, my birthday. Please come. Please do not buy me a drink. I get them for free.
It seems that when I type the word where, the second e usually ends up capitalized. Weird? I don’t know. Insignificant? Yes.
I bought two masks today. One is a snow owl, one is for a mental hospital patient that likes to eat faces. FUN TIMES U.S.A!!!
I’m listening to the new Wilco live album. I’m not sure how I feel about it. It’s kind of boring, but I expected it to be kind of boring.
Traversing
Rather than just sit here and be complacent with the infomercial that is blaring at me, behind me, I will update the entire WORLD of the goings-ons of my life. It will be fantastic.
I visited four bars tonight. I am not drunk, nor have I been drunk because of drinking boooooze tonight.
Delilah's had very few patrons. The DJ played what he wanted. He played Howlin Wolf, The Undertones, Gene Vincent and more music that I like. Max would have liked it. Instead, he is in Europe, probably setting fires. Kelsey and I played pool.
The Empty Bottle show is coming up. YAY! THINGS TO DO!
"Somebody Put Something In My Drink" by the Ramones is a bad song. No ifs, ands or buts about it.
My face will one day be on a t-shirt. It will be a negative portrayel of me. Do not buy such a shirt. Fuck you if you do. In fact, fuck all of you. Why haven't you put me on a t-shirt? You're all so dumb.
I visited four bars tonight. I am not drunk, nor have I been drunk because of drinking boooooze tonight.
Delilah's had very few patrons. The DJ played what he wanted. He played Howlin Wolf, The Undertones, Gene Vincent and more music that I like. Max would have liked it. Instead, he is in Europe, probably setting fires. Kelsey and I played pool.
The Empty Bottle show is coming up. YAY! THINGS TO DO!
"Somebody Put Something In My Drink" by the Ramones is a bad song. No ifs, ands or buts about it.
My face will one day be on a t-shirt. It will be a negative portrayel of me. Do not buy such a shirt. Fuck you if you do. In fact, fuck all of you. Why haven't you put me on a t-shirt? You're all so dumb.
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Saturday, November 12, 2005
Hooray for metal!
Zach Wylde is playing next door. About 10 of Jeremy's friends came over to drink before the show. All of them have on black leather Black Label Society vests. They are all very polite. Yay for metal.
This can't be good
Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating. My profile name: foulinc |
Friday, November 11, 2005
I want to conquer the world
Mike and I saw Bad Religion. They were good.
I finally have a job interview. Though it's only $10 an hour, it's something. Thanks to everyone who gave me help in what to do. I appreciate it.
Kelsey, Mike, Steve and some guy I know but don't know the name of are drinking in The Machine. It's after 1 am on a Thursday night/Friday morning. "When the Levee Breaks" is on. Ironic?
My heart feels weird.
I finally have a job interview. Though it's only $10 an hour, it's something. Thanks to everyone who gave me help in what to do. I appreciate it.
Kelsey, Mike, Steve and some guy I know but don't know the name of are drinking in The Machine. It's after 1 am on a Thursday night/Friday morning. "When the Levee Breaks" is on. Ironic?
My heart feels weird.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Summer teeth
I’ve always thought that Corus bank is the low-class of the banks. All the tellers seem to be college dropouts. No one with any real money would ever use it as their sole bank. I used to think that this was one of the reasons I used it as my bank. No longer. I feel like a loser every time I go in there. I have to ask for my balance because I no longer have an ATM card. Then I get my balance. I may have a college degree, but the guy behind the counter has more than $7.40 in his account.
After leaving my bank, I headed over to The Machine. In July, this place was great. As time passed, the place has become a sour reminder of how I’m fucking up. There really isn’t anything I can do, besides get a full-time job, to get this fucker in print. So if anyone knows of anyone who can and will hire me, let me know. If not, well, then the magazine has been printed, you just don’t have one because they flew off shelves (or in this case, floors).
So with no real purpose and not enough money to do much of anything, I’ve decided to head to Pilsen for some photos that need to be taken. After that jaunt, I will travel to Chinatown. Chinatown usually makes me somewhat happy. I have no bad memories associated with the place and the noodle place I always go to is cheap.
But before I leave, I must find some company. It’s this weird desire to spread the wealth of my boredom. I will offer nothing insightful or witty, but I will pay for your meal, so you better come. So for the past hour or so, I’ve been looking for comrades online with no luck. This has led me to myspace. Rather than sit here and feel sorry for myself, I try to add hundreds of “friends” for Fetor. Why? I have no idea why. It gets my mind off of things, at least it used to. I just spent three and half minutes on some 16-year olds page because she was streaming “Me and Mia” by Ted Leo. And that, is fucked up.
I first read “Seize the Day” during the summer of 2001. I didn’t like the book. It didn’t click with me or something. I was forced to re-read it in my junior or senior year at DePaul. It’s now one of my favorite books. I’m starting to understand why Tommy Wilhelm loses his mind. I might not have an ex-wife, kids, money or a father, but I do think I can relate. God damn. Things could be a lot worse. I could have a Corgan sized ego.
After leaving my bank, I headed over to The Machine. In July, this place was great. As time passed, the place has become a sour reminder of how I’m fucking up. There really isn’t anything I can do, besides get a full-time job, to get this fucker in print. So if anyone knows of anyone who can and will hire me, let me know. If not, well, then the magazine has been printed, you just don’t have one because they flew off shelves (or in this case, floors).
So with no real purpose and not enough money to do much of anything, I’ve decided to head to Pilsen for some photos that need to be taken. After that jaunt, I will travel to Chinatown. Chinatown usually makes me somewhat happy. I have no bad memories associated with the place and the noodle place I always go to is cheap.
But before I leave, I must find some company. It’s this weird desire to spread the wealth of my boredom. I will offer nothing insightful or witty, but I will pay for your meal, so you better come. So for the past hour or so, I’ve been looking for comrades online with no luck. This has led me to myspace. Rather than sit here and feel sorry for myself, I try to add hundreds of “friends” for Fetor. Why? I have no idea why. It gets my mind off of things, at least it used to. I just spent three and half minutes on some 16-year olds page because she was streaming “Me and Mia” by Ted Leo. And that, is fucked up.
I first read “Seize the Day” during the summer of 2001. I didn’t like the book. It didn’t click with me or something. I was forced to re-read it in my junior or senior year at DePaul. It’s now one of my favorite books. I’m starting to understand why Tommy Wilhelm loses his mind. I might not have an ex-wife, kids, money or a father, but I do think I can relate. God damn. Things could be a lot worse. I could have a Corgan sized ego.
Friday, November 04, 2005
Killing
This entire week has been a waste. No job leads, no progress on the magazine, no fun. The only positive is having another song for the band. That isn't a joke.
I'm about to head over to the Brain. Stop by. I'll be standing/sitting near the door til 2. We can share a story and then fight over the relevance of a "Rocky VI" in the year 2005.
I'm about to head over to the Brain. Stop by. I'll be standing/sitting near the door til 2. We can share a story and then fight over the relevance of a "Rocky VI" in the year 2005.
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Not the Lord's day
Why did we stay out so late? It was a Tuesday for Christ’s sake.
Mike wanted to get out of his house last night. So we did. Like most 22-year olds that want to get out of their house at 10 p.m., he wanted to drink. Fine by me.
The two of us began our adventure with a nice, chilly walk from my mom’s apartment. We arrived at the less than classy Shortstop Lounge 20 minutes later. Though Mike grew up just a few blocks from the saloon, he had never been inside. It was my fifth or so time drinking in Forest Park and it was already my second time at said establishment.
The bar has a unique drink special, $3.50 mason jars of Millet Lite, PBR and MGD. The regulars seem to match the specials, cheap but rewarding. In the three and a half hours spent at the establishment, we saw a young fellow try to steal one (ONE!) bottle of opened beer, a middle-aged man play most of Gwen Stefani’s album “for the ladies” (there were 4 ladies in the entire place) and one of the ladies swear at a video poker machine like a sailor with a love for Dennis Leary.
Mike and I were not done at 2 a.m. We decided to continue our adventure and head northeast to Underbar.
Underbar is a 4 a.m. establishment. It’s not that cheap, but the clientele is somewhat “hip” and we were lucky to have a place to sit. Dan, a bartender at the Hungry Brain, the bar I work at, was there drinking with his pal Mike.
“Mike, this is my friend Mike.”
“Hey, Mike.”
“Mike plays bass.”
“I play treble.”
Clever.
Since no trip to Underbar is complete without a visit to Blue Light, Mike and I went next door to one of the sleaziest bars in the city. Blue Light is the kind of place that caters to people with wandering eyes, poor teeth and low standards. In our 30-minutes there, the bartender threatened to “put you guys in the corner,” heard Cher’s “Believe,” sang along to Cher’s “Believe,” petted a dog to the beat of Cher’s “Believe” and Mike called a friend at 3:49 a.m. asking if she wanted to pick up a “McBeer” with him.
Don’t piss on Underbar. Nothing good ever comes from pissing on Underbar. I’ll leave it at that.
I got home at 4:45 a.m. Mike had work at 9 a.m. in Des Plaines. It was a Tuesday night.
Mike wanted to get out of his house last night. So we did. Like most 22-year olds that want to get out of their house at 10 p.m., he wanted to drink. Fine by me.
The two of us began our adventure with a nice, chilly walk from my mom’s apartment. We arrived at the less than classy Shortstop Lounge 20 minutes later. Though Mike grew up just a few blocks from the saloon, he had never been inside. It was my fifth or so time drinking in Forest Park and it was already my second time at said establishment.
The bar has a unique drink special, $3.50 mason jars of Millet Lite, PBR and MGD. The regulars seem to match the specials, cheap but rewarding. In the three and a half hours spent at the establishment, we saw a young fellow try to steal one (ONE!) bottle of opened beer, a middle-aged man play most of Gwen Stefani’s album “for the ladies” (there were 4 ladies in the entire place) and one of the ladies swear at a video poker machine like a sailor with a love for Dennis Leary.
Mike and I were not done at 2 a.m. We decided to continue our adventure and head northeast to Underbar.
Underbar is a 4 a.m. establishment. It’s not that cheap, but the clientele is somewhat “hip” and we were lucky to have a place to sit. Dan, a bartender at the Hungry Brain, the bar I work at, was there drinking with his pal Mike.
“Mike, this is my friend Mike.”
“Hey, Mike.”
“Mike plays bass.”
“I play treble.”
Clever.
Since no trip to Underbar is complete without a visit to Blue Light, Mike and I went next door to one of the sleaziest bars in the city. Blue Light is the kind of place that caters to people with wandering eyes, poor teeth and low standards. In our 30-minutes there, the bartender threatened to “put you guys in the corner,” heard Cher’s “Believe,” sang along to Cher’s “Believe,” petted a dog to the beat of Cher’s “Believe” and Mike called a friend at 3:49 a.m. asking if she wanted to pick up a “McBeer” with him.
Don’t piss on Underbar. Nothing good ever comes from pissing on Underbar. I’ll leave it at that.
I got home at 4:45 a.m. Mike had work at 9 a.m. in Des Plaines. It was a Tuesday night.
Sabine's blog did this
Leave your name and
1. I'll respond with a celebrity you remind me of.
-kurt cobain or a bum
2. I'll tell you what I really think about you.
-you're an incredibly talented and gifted artist, i wish you'd get a leg up
3. I'll tell you what song you remind me of.
-any nirvana song
4. My favorite memory of you.
-"wanna blow this popsicle stand and get a drink?" turns into drinking boone's farm at 11am. OORRRRR HIM AND MONSTER MAGNET!!
5. I'll tell you what cartoon you remind me of.
-doug
6. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal.
I love this shit and I have no idea why. If you leave a message on the post with your name, I'll do the same.
1. I'll respond with a celebrity you remind me of.
-kurt cobain or a bum
2. I'll tell you what I really think about you.
-you're an incredibly talented and gifted artist, i wish you'd get a leg up
3. I'll tell you what song you remind me of.
-any nirvana song
4. My favorite memory of you.
-"wanna blow this popsicle stand and get a drink?" turns into drinking boone's farm at 11am. OORRRRR HIM AND MONSTER MAGNET!!
5. I'll tell you what cartoon you remind me of.
-doug
6. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal.
I love this shit and I have no idea why. If you leave a message on the post with your name, I'll do the same.
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