Music with Meaning Night 3 Recap

I'm sick.

Music with Meaning Night 2 Recap

First Music with Meaning show in Pilsen. First Music with Meaning show in a church that was out of operation. First Music with Meanign show, to my knowledge, that a band member walked out of due to booze.

Emily Jane Powers, In Miniature and Hotel Brotherhood put on excellent shows. The setting made everything feel surreal (does that make sense?) and the beer before, during and after the show added a fuzzy feeling.

Waking up at 9am to buy records today was a bad idea. Eating Pizza Hut was worse than the night of drinking.

Music with Meaning Night 1 Recap

Altgeld Forgotten made me smile. Paper Bullets made me hurt my neck. Herb danced too much and fell into a chair. Herb is my boss.

Evening 1 was a success. No injuries, a good amount of people (about 100), pleasant weather and Eric got to DJ for the majority of the night.

Thanks to everyone that came out. The next three nights will mellow everyone.

Legal advice

There is a construction crew on the balcony. They're here every Monday through Friday, 7:30am until 4pm. They have jackhammers. Many jackhammers. It's impossible to sleep when a jackhammer is in use and less than 10 feet away. Trust me, I've tried. It doesn't matter if you haven't slept in 48-hours or are really drunk, it's impossible to sleep.

I live in an apartment. When the lease was signed for the year there was no mention of construction. No rights. There is no way to get out of the lease. There's a jackhammer 10 feet from me.

This construction is making it hard not to be a racist. I'm starting to hold grudges against old, Jewish men just because of one guy.

848

Music with Meaning 7 begins tonight. Paper Bullets and Altgeld Forgotten will play rock and roll/punk music and Eric Lab Rat, Kelsey Snell and I will spin records. It will be fun if people show up.

If you listen to NPR and live in Chicago you might hear the festival getting mentioned on the morning show Eight Forty Eight. Hooray. That wasn't sarcasm. I'm just not sure how much it'll help.

Oprah had a Legends Ball. Alicia Keys, Ashanti, Angela Bassett, Halle Berry, Mary J. Blige, Brandy, Naomi Campbell, Mariah Carey, Natalie Cole, Kimberly Elise, Missy Elliott, Tyra Banks, Iman, Janet Jackson, Phylicia Rashad, Debbie Allen and Alfre Woodard were honored.

Alicia Keys - made famous because of Clive Davis, on old white guy
Ashanti - made famous because of a corrupt record label, Murder Inc.
Angela Bassett - most famous role is of Tina Turner in "What's Love Got to do With It", got the shit kicked out of her by Ike
Halle Berry - only won an Academy Award after showing her breasts
Mary J. Blige - well documented coke problem
Brandy - became famous after doing mall tours for a record label run by old white guys
Naomi Campbell - too easy
Mariah Carey - married her old boss
Natalie Cole - drug problem, most famous for 'duet' with her father
Kimberly Elise - unknown by most, invited for her role in the Oprah produced film "Beloved"
Missy Elliott - "Put the pussy on ya, like I told ya" from "Work It"
Tyra Banks - she put on a fat suit to 'understand' how it is to be overweight and then cried to actual obese people about her experience
Iman - married to David Bowie, actually qualifies as legendary is my mind
Janet Jackson - too easy
Phylicia Rashad - a famous Brooklyn based lawyer with a loving family and a well-to-do doctor husband
Debbie Allen - I used to love "A Different World"
Alfre Woodard - I got nothing on Mrs. Woodard. She's a well-respected actress and hasn't taken many sub-par roles.

I'm a bigger legend than most of these women. I just don't have some old white guy telling me what to do.

I have so many posters

20. Alix Kates Shulman "Memoirs of an Ex-Prom Queen"

The festival starts a week from today. 30 days of stuff to do. Blow me.

Sandwich

It has recently come to my attention that I am not growing as a writer. In the past five months I've yet to write anything substantial. Lots of lists about music (which probably says something about my relationships with anyone human) and fear of saying something that will cause trouble. Friends of mine who I thought were horrible writers have lapped me tenfold. Good?

I can't name drop here. Nor will I make a list. Out of fear I will not rate my friends.

My problem, at least what I think is my problem, is that I can't stop thinking about these people. Thinking about these people leads me to not write. What is there to write about? There's a lot to write about, a lot I want to 'say', but I'm not thinking of anything. So I surround myself with them. Whenever one is too far out of reach I call for coffee or beer or something. If I'm friends with writers I must be one too.

---

I just finished watching "The Jacket". Eh.

19. Rich Koslowski "The King"

From yesterday's child show experience

I just watched Buddy Guy on an episode of "Big Music Show" on the kids network Noggin. He played the "King of Swing". Does anyone out there have the audacity and lack of soul to call Mr. Guy a sell-out?

The show was hard to watch.

Guy looks a lot better without hair.

A blue puppet played a horn.

Fucking weird.

I like Buddy Guy, but why didn't they get Brian Setzer? He plays "swing" music. The show was weird.

"Action" movie

The "Harry Potter" series puts the lead characters in danger for no reason. They create the danger that almost kills them. It's true with most action movies. If characters just pulled out guns most problems would be solved within ten minutes.

Knowing your role

It's 10:36 am. I'm watching Comedy Central. A David Cross comedy special is on. If there was no apartment construction, no job, etc. I would just be waking up. I would still be watching the same thing. The commercial that just aired was for Taco Bell. Rather than try to come across as healthy or cheap, they're focusing on the fact that drunks like to eat Taco Bell as their "Fourth Meal". Kudos, Taco Bell. Thank you for not bullshitting everyone.

You'll never be satisfied if you don't know why you're doing it

With each passing day I'm getting shorter and shorter with the talent that is part of Music with Meaning 7. Questions that need to be answered like set times, prices, load-in times, etc. don't bother me. They make sense. Questions and/or concerns about bands getting paid don't irritate me. I can understand that. Gas is expensive, it's a hassle to lug equipment around, blah blah blah. I'm in a band, I get it. What I don't get is when bands with little to no real fan base expect to be treated like they sold out an arena.

In every interview I've given about Music with Meaning (I know it's not a lot, but humor me) I've wanted to talk shit about all the bands that said no for what I consider bullshit reasons. Bullshit reasons are: wanting money (bands didn't get paid for Music with Meaning 1-6) and not playing "smaller shows". My response to the former complaint is that you don't deserve any money. You'd be playing 30-minutes for 100 people on a lineup with 10 other bands. If we split the money evenly among bands you'd be taking home about $15. That's nothing. Selling a shirt and CD would make you more and make the show worthwhile to play. To bands that want more money to play, break up. I only asked you to play because someone else likes you and charity is charity.

I never really had any performer tell me they were 'too big' until this year. It's funny to me because bands that they open for, bands that are 'bigger' are playing the festival. The band that said no has played showcases for every major and indie label they wanted to be on and all of them said no. The band hasn't had a decent show in 6-months. The band has lost key members. In other words, if they band ever 'makes it' it won't be with their current line-up and it won't be with the songs they're playing.

I won't write the name of the band. Anyone who is a friend of mine already know what band I'm referring to. The best part about the entire thing is I only asked the band out of pity. I like their frontman outside of a musical context and I felt bad for the guy because his band isn't really going anywhere.

The first hipster

James Dean, Alan Ginsberg or Bob Dylan was not the first hipster. They may have helped define cool or weird or counter-culture but Hunter S. Thompson holds the title of the world's first hipster.

The Gonzo writer loved himself. No respectable human being would take copious amounts of drugs and write about the experience like he was the first person to ever "lose their mind". Have respect for your elders, realize that you're not the first person to do anything and don't treat people like shit just because you can. How did Mr. Thompson treat people like shit? He trashed hotel rooms, destroyed cars and, worst of all, killed himself with a gun. Blue collar workers had to clean up all of his messes. His white collar Rolling Stone editors laughed and marveled at his whirlwind experiences. This is the self-involved giving a hand job to the ultimate hipster.

Anyone can write like Hunter S. Thompson. It's a simple process that requires no drug use, money or writing ability.

Step 1: Stay up all night.
Step 2: Record any/everything that comes in your mind (on paper or on tape).
Step 3: Think up enemies (real or fictional).
Step 4: Define your generation with someone/thing corrupt (war, politician, natural disaster, etc.).
Step 5: Refer to pop culture icons on a first name basis.
Step 6: Mourn the loss of the "good old days".
Step 7: Edit nothing.

There you go, the process of Gonzo journalism. This easily translates into hipster living.

Step 1: Look like you've stayed up all night.
Step 2: Talk about recordings and writings that no one has ever heard of.
Step 3: Think up enemies and mention to everyone how you did a shitload of lines with them.
Step 4: Define yourself with someone/thing corrupt.
Step 5: Refer to tabloid fodder on a first name basis.
Step 6: Mourn the loss of your childhood.
Step 7: Think of no one but yourself and/or celebrities.

You can do it, anyone can do it, no one should do it.

Music, I've been working in music

My friends ask me what I'm listening to. I ask my friends what they're listening to. Fuck that. I don't want to talk to my friends. I HAVE A BLOG! Here are my...

TOP 68 ALBUMS OF 2006 AS OF TODAY, HOORAY, FUCK THE KKK!!!
1. Gnarls Barkley "St. Elsewhere"
"Crazy" is the best single of the year and "Just a Thought" is the best song of the year with the best lyric of the year, "It's not just good/it's great depression".
2. Mark Pickerel "Snake in the Radio"
Mr. Pickerel played drums in the Screaming Trees. Now he's fronting an alt-country band. It's great. Bloodshot's best release since Neko Case's "Blacklisted".
3. Sally "The Picardy Third EP"
Grrrtars. (Comment based on the work of the Charlie)
4. Neko Cash "Fox Confessor Brings the Flood"
No pro-tools, no Bloodshot and no remixes from The Neptunes.
5. MC Lars "The Graduate"
Critics hated this album. I liked every song on it. I know it's juvenile but I listen to every song without skipping, so it's good.
6. NOFX "Never Trust a Hippy"
"You're wrong for not hating Ann Coulter/cause she's a cunted cunt"
7. The Submarines "Declare A New State"
This album doesn't come out til June so don't try to steal it yet. I've never heard of the band and I'm pretty sure this is their debut. It's the album Mates of States would've made if they broke up.
8. Eagles of Death Metal "Death By Sexy"
This music should produce many children out of wedlock.
9. The Deadstring Brothers "Starving Winter Report"
I want to see them perform.
10. Magneto "Sounds Like Space"
Veruca Salt if they never dated Dave Grohl.

11. Quasi "When the Going Gets Dark"
If I was really hip I'd make this my number one pick.
12. The Strokes "First Impressions of Earth"
I hated the first Strokes album. I didn't like the second Strokes album. I like the Strokes third album.
13. Drive-By Truckers "A Blessing and a Curse"
I wish the Drive-By Truckers were the house band at the Horseshoe.
14. Sondre Lerche With the Faces Down Quartet "Duper Sessions"
15. Beth Orton "Comfort of Strangers"
16. The Sword "Age of Winters"
Metal. Metal.
17. NOFX "Wolves in Wolves Clothing"
18. Bonnie "Prince" Billy/Tortoise "The Brave and the Bold"
I listened to their version of Elton John's "Daniel" on repeat while wandering around Manhattan in March.
19. The Flaming Lips "At War with the Mystics"
20. charliedeets "The Lost Larrikin Long Play"
No grrtars.

21. Electric Six "Senor Smoke"
22. The Streets "The Hardest Way to Make an Easy Living"
The hip-hop version of Arctic Monkeys.
23. Arctic Monkeys "Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I Am Not"
The rock version of The Streets.
24. Brian Eno/David Byrne "My Life in the Bush of Ghosts"
Reissue. So what. New packaging and extra tracks.
25. Eels "With Strings: Live at Town Hall"
E might have released an album that is actually too depressing.
26. The Fever "In the City of Sleep"
27. Built to Spill "You In Reverse"
28. Ben Harper "Both Sides of the Gun"
Anyone can enjoy this double album, even if you don't get high every other hour.
29. The Concretes "In Colour"
30. Cat Power "The Greatest"

31. Mudhoney "Under a Billion Suns"
32. I Love You But I've Chosen Darkness "Fear Is On Our Side"
33. Sean Watkins "Blidners On"
Some dude from Nickel Creek's third solo album is actually good.
34. Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins "Rabbit Fur Coat"
The soft singing is a turn off but there's something about this album that I initialy dismissed. Probably the twins. COORS LIGHT RULES!!!
35. The Vines "Vision Valley"
A few of the later tracks on the album are obviously influenced by late 60s psychadelic rock. These songs are good.
36. Goldfrapp "Supernature"
37. Secret Machines "Ten Silver Drops"
38. The Coup "Pick a Bigger Weapon"
39. Rainer Maria "Catastrophe Keeps Us Together"
40. The M's "Future Woman"

41. The Lawrence Arms "Oh! Calcutta!"
42. Massive Attack "Collected"
I've only listened to one of the two discs and haven't watched the 16 videos that comes in the package. Once I do this will probably rise in the list.
43. Loose Fur "Born Again in the USA"
I did not enjoy this one as much as the debut. I blame the lack of painkillers.
44. Mates of State "Bring It Back"
45. Two Gallants "What the Toll Tells"
46. Islands "Return to the Sea"
47. Elefant "The Black Magic Show"
48. The Minus 5 "The Minus Five"
49. Morningwood "Morningwood"
50. Bruce Springsteen "We Shall Overcome: The Seeger Sessions"
Though I've never been a fan of Springsteen his voice really fits with these songs. The laid back atmosphere of random studio musicians doesn't hurt either.

51. Placebo "Meds"
Just as good as their last two albums. Just as decent. Yep.
52. The Metal Hearts "Socialize"
53. Hank Williams III "Straight to Hell"
54. Fiery Furnaces "Bitter Tea"
55. Audio Bullys "Generation"
56. MONO "You Are There"
57. Margot and the Nuclear So and Sos "The Dust of Retreat"
These guys have only been around since late 2004. Good for them?
58. Pretty Girls Make Graves "Élan Vital"
I'm fucking hip.
59. Young People "All At Once"
60. The Dresden Dolls "Yes, Virginia"
Maybe I'll understand all of it by the end of the year. I bet there's nothing to understand, it's on Roadrunner.

61. Morrissey "Ringleader of the Tormentors"
62. Revolting Cocks "Cocked and Loaded"
I'll always consider Al a Chicagoan because he did most of the hardcore drug use here.
63. Belle and Sebastian "The Life Pursuit"
64. Arab Strap "The Last Romance"
65. The Sounds "Dying to Say This To You"
TITTIES ON THE COVER!
66. Controller.Controller "X-Amounts"
67. Yeah Yeah Yeah's "Show Your Bones"
"Gold Lion" is a good song. The rest is shit. SHIT! GO BACK TO THE BLOW YOU OLD FUCKS!!!
68. Calexico "Garden Ruin"

Albums that will probably be on this list as soon as I hear them
Isobel Campbell and Mark Lanegan "Ballad of the Broken Seas"
Pearl Jam "Pearl Jam"
Tool "10,000 Days"
Jesus and the Devil

Bold = Chicago based

Since I'm working for a summer music festival, college radio station and Music with Meaning 7, I listen to a lot of new music. I've probably reviewed 500 albums since January. I'm lucky to be able to hear so much music for free. I know that none of this matters. Music reviews are subjective so all they really need to say is "Good" or "Bad". I know this but continue to write about albums. Whatever. My album is the best album ever created.

I read a book

18. Mike Royko “One More Time: The Best of Mike Royko”

Defending Pearl Jam for no specific reason

Every band that’s forming should study Pearl Jam. After more than fifteen years of existence the band is as good as they’ve ever been. Rather than rest on their laurels and continue to pursue a sound that made them famous, they’ve grown musically and lyrically. Mr. Vedder picked up guitar, they’ve released one video since “Ten” (the Todd McFarlane animated “Do The Evolution”), Matt Cameron from Soundgarden is the current drummer and back-up vocalist (and a fine one at that), toured consistently since their fight against TicketMaster, released quality sounding live recordings and every member has a hand in the songwriting process. Put simply, Pearl Jam is the current generation’s Neil Young. To hell with the backlash that comes with liking every/any mainstream band. Pearl Jam is the best (consistently good, not necessarily the most influential) American rock band of the last 20-years, if not the history of rock and roll.

For those of you who instantly dismiss any mention of Pearl Jam, please keep in mind that Mr. Vedder played on Cat Power’s “You Are Free”, Mike Watt’s “Ballhog or Tugboat?”, Bad Religion’s “Recipe for Hate” and with the Supersuckers. In other words, he’s probably recorded with someone you don’t consider corporate or a sell-out or some other phrase that’s used too much to dismiss artists.

---

17. Mike Royko “Sez Who? Sez Me”
16. Saul Bellow “The Actual”

I want Mike Royko’s old job.

I hope to one day have the ability to write like Saul Bellow.

Chicago is the greatest city of all-time because it spawned Mike Royko and Saul Bellow. Eddie Vedder grew up in Evanston and that city (?) has an el line so it counts too.

Forgot words

I read another book after 15 but I can't remember what it was. I am now angry with myself.

15. J.T. Leroy (Editor) "Da Capo Best Music Writing 2005: The Year's Finest Writing on Rock, Hip-hop, Jazz, Pop, Country & More"
14. Jeffery Brown "AEIOU: Any Easy Intimacy"

I'm counting 14 even though it's a graphic novel because I want to reach 50. I'll take out graphic novels and novellas if I can still reach 50.

It's a fucking blog, what did you expect?

Neko Case

The best part about podcasts are being able to hear stories I would have otherwise missed. One is about Neko Case's new album.

NPR was smart enough to interview the musician about her new album "Fox Confessor Brings the Flood". In the piece she explains the recording and the song writing process about the song "John the Baptist". I now respect her more than I did before.

Ms. Case performed at the Vic Theater last Friday night. She was very, very good.

I am not a musician. Neko Case is a musician. That is fine. I am 1/4 of the official band of the revolution.

Try to figure that shit out.

June will be busy

As of now The Machine has Music with Meaning 7 events planned at: Liar's Club, Mojoe's, Skylark, Cal's, Double Door, Martyrs, Abbey Pub, Delilahs, Hungry Brain, California Clipper, Lincoln Square Lanes, Collonade Room, Darkroom, Quimby's, Empty Bottle, Schubas, Betty's Blue Star Lounge and DePaul.

There will be stuff to do.

This city, I've said all I've needed to say about this city

I'm not DJing. The bar is doing a photo shoot and then refinishing the floors or something. So I'm back in Queens and watching the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony. Blondie is currently being honored. I think Blondie was a great (note past tense) band and I think Debbie Harry was a great frontwoman. But sex can't sell forever.

Travel

I am in New York. It took more than six hours to get to where I'm at in Queens. That time was spent reading. I was able to finish a few books. Here they are.

13. David Sedaris "Barrel Fever"
12. Saul Bellow "A Theft"
11. Chuck Klosterman "Fargo Rock City"

Music with Meaning 7 is looking alright. Over a third of the dates have venues and it looks like we'll be able to have most of our favorite acts play. Blah blah blah.

Maybe this city won't suck.

Pearl Jam/Loose Fur

The song "Apostolic" on the new Loose Fur album "Born Again in the USA" sounds like a "weird" song on the 1994 Peal Jam release "Vitalogy".

313

I have a newfound respect for Eminem, Jack White and Kid Rock. They may be millionaires but they still haven't left Detroit. I respect that. I got the fuck out after five days.

I'm reviewing new albums from Built to Spill, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, MC Lars and many more. If you know me, you know what this means.

Fetor's "A Campaign of Suffering" may already have an album cover. I'll know in a few days. I think I need to look at it completely awake, sober, drunk, hungover, happy and angry to find out if I really like it.

I hate religion more than ever. Unless I'm your god.

Almost forgot

10. Augusten Burroughs "Running With Scissors"

In Sheffield

Richard Hawley released an album in September called "Coles Corner." I'm kicking myself for not listening to it when it came out. It's a great album full of rock and roll songs that are comfortable being pop songs. Nothing is out of place or emphasized. Hawley is a confident song-writer that seems to know his songs perfectly. The point is, try to find this record. It makes me happy to work in music.

Dear Crystal Lake,

Fuck you. Don't be afraid of the Gay Games.

I am not gay but I really want to have sex with as many men as possible in the middle of your town.

Fuck you. There is no god.

-B.W.

Very young (it's from a song, very few of you will know the correlation between this song and post)

Since I'll probably only DJ once this month I decided to keep track of what I played. The following is what Eric Lab Rat and I spun last Tuesday at Liar's Club. If there are spelling errors, please forgive us. We were typing with only one hand while continually drinking.

Pelican "March to the Sea" from "The Fire In Our Throats Will Beckon the Thaw"
Sally "Abundant Sunshine" from "The Picardy Third EP"

Then the computer froze.

Before the computer stopped working we played songs from: Head of Femur, The Fiery Furnaces, Wesley Willis/Kanye West/Curtis Mayfield (mashup), Common, Volta Do Mar, Bonnie "Prince" Billy and Tortoise, The Like Young, Jesus and the Devil, 1000 Homo DJs, Ministry, Liz Phair, Small Change, Scotland Yard Gospel Choir, Canasta, The Reptoids, New Black, Buddy Guy, Bo Diddley/Muddy Waters/Little Walter, Proswell, Typical Cats, Dove Rock, The Molemen, Pailhead, Groovy Ghoulies, Articles Of Faith, Lovely Little Girls, Bobby Conn, The Bhopal Stiffs, Felix da Housecat, Caural, I Attack, Howlin' Wolf, Rapeman and other artists we forgot.

From 11:49 on, here is what Eric and I played

Curtis Mayfield "(Don't Worry) If there's a Hell Below, We're All Going to Go" from "Curtis"

[i don't like song titles. or capitalization. --eric]

mwc - certain fate
twista - ???
My Life with The Thrill Kill Kult "Sex on Wheels"
Los Crudos - ???
Secret Agent Bill - Outside

Articles Of Faith "Buy This War" from "Complete Discograph Vol. 2: 1983-1985"
The Tossers "Goodmornin' Da" from "The Valley of the Shadow of Death"
Tub Ring "Faster" from "Drake Equation" - some guy comes to the DJ booth and waves a finger at me screaming, "Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes!"
Oh My God "Get Steady" from "Interrogations and Confessions"
M.O.T.O. track 3 from "Raw Power"

Velcro Lewis and His 100 Proof Band "Rockin' and Drinkin' (Tonight)" from "...Ruin Everything"
Twin Wrecks the Memory "Alcohol and Rock N' Roll" from "Royal Drug Lodge (Trouble for the Rest of Us)"
Evil Beaver "Our Garden" from "Lick It!"
Tight Phantomz "DUI in St. Charles" from "Crazy When Wet"
Cheap Trick "He's A Whore" from "Cheap Trick"

The Shadows of Knight "Bad Little Woman" from Back Door Man"
The Dells "Our Love" from "Anthology"
Qwel - ???
Junior Wells "Baby, What You Want Me To Do?" from "The Blues Collection"
Radiant Darling "Familiar"

The Coughs - ???
Milemarker- Idle Hands
Big Black - the Model
All Natural - ???
Kungfu Rick - ???

The Afflictions "God Wants You to Have a Good Time" from "Janet Style"
Neko Case and Her Boyfriends "Honky Tonk Hiccups" from "The Virginian"
Twang Bang - I Feel Weird
Outlaw Family Bad "Ravenswood Getaway, Pt. 1" from "Outlaw Family Band"
The Orphan Punks - ???

The Cryan Shames "Greenburg, Glickenstein, Charles, David Smith & Jones" from "Synthesis"
The Smashing Pumpkins - some live bootleg from 1988
Sam Cooke "Having a Party" from "Live at the Harlem Square Club"
Marvelkind "Central City" from "Conquering the Universe Chorus Verse"
Local H "Cooler Heads" from "The No Fun E.P."

Shellac "Dog and Pony Show" from "At Action Park"
Poster Children "Clampdown" from "On The Offensive"
Screeching Weasel "I Was a High School Psychopath" from "Wiggle"
Smoking Popes "The Party's Over" from "The Party's Over"
The Bomb "Up from the Floor" from "Indecision"

Caviar "The Good Times Are Over" from "Caviar"

Oscar related

9. June Carter Cash "From the Heart"

This barely qualifies as a book. If a musician ever needed a ghost writer it would be June Carter Cash. Regardless, it's hard not to like at least some aspect of this woman after breezing through 200 pages of antidotes, photos and a strong faith in God.

For all intensive purposes

The Machine Media has a new Web site. Yes, Web site is supposed to be spelled with a capital W and it is two words. I think it looks like shit. The A.P. does not think it looks like shit.

I have not slept.

Antichrist

8. "Rotten" by John Lydon

Because of this autobiography from the early 90s I now appreciate the Sex Pistols. I still prefer Iggy and the Stooges.

Pink Gun made this girl and her roommate cry

I prefer John Lydon the author to Johnny Rotten the front man

I’m in my office at the radio station waiting for my job interview call to come in. I’m sandwiched between my suitcase and a red bucket for kegs. There is nothing I can do that doesn’t make me anxious. I do not know why this is.

For the past month or so I’ve cut of friends. This hasn’t been intentional…I’ll be back.

---

I think it went well. If I get the job I’ll barely be in Chicago. Maybe I need to do this.

I just want to listen to…
Jack White “Never Far Away”
NOFX “You’re Wrong”
Iggy Pop “Tiny Girls”
The Strokes “Ask Me Anything”
Charlie Deets “My Tranquility Has Been Confiscayted”

The list should be longer. I’m not including anything too mainstream or boring out of fear. If everyone can understand it then it’s no good. I’ll never be hip. I’LL NEVER BE HIP. I won’t be able to do as many lines as you’d like me to. I can’t live with that.

I should have stayed with the same girl I was with at 18. Then I could read my books in peace.

I'm glad you're alive

After more than a year and a half of no communication, I found my ex-girlfriend on myspace.

Melina moved to Greece in 2000. I saw her in 2003. I talked to her on the phone in the spring of 2004.

She's fine. Been with the same guy for almost three years. Lives with her grandmother. Still in college. Out of work but had a job for a while.

I used to worry about Melina. I'm not sure why but I felt like a big brother. She's fine. I'm the one that's stuck out here.

WHINE WHINE WHINE!!!

Things could be much worse. At least "Cry-Baby" is on.

I used to want to direct films. I still do. But it seems like a chore to watch a new film on television or DVD. It's too hard to escape my surroundings when starting something new, specifically if I know something about the film.

Oak Park won't be home for much longer and I'm grateful for that. If I get the union organiser position I should be living in Chicago by April. If I don't get the job and I'm still with my mother and not dead, we'll probably be in some other suburb. This is fine by me. It's good that Oak Park is close to everything but I can't stand living in the same room where I first had sex.


After stopping at the camera shop I took a new way back to the apartment. It looked like the photo. Except colder. Everything has that frozen look.

I almost forgot...

7. "Ordinary People" by Judith Guest

It's an American classic by most critic's standards. I do not agree. I'll try to sum it all up: mom is a cunt that needs to hug her child, father is a well-meaning guy that never really had a family so he doesn't want to disappoint the only one he's ever known and the kid is an uptight perfectionist that likes to blame himself over his brother's death. I didn't care about any of the characters and wished they would stop complaining and happily spend their North shore money. Maybe I would have liked the son more if he had decent music taste.

Part 4

Top 10 Music Related Couples and Former Couples I Want To See With A Kid
1. Joel Madden and Hillary Duff
2. Fez and Lindsey Lohan
3. Fez and Mandy Moore
4. Fez and Ashley Simpson
5. Ryan Carababababa and Ashley Simpson
6. Deryck Whibley and Avril Lavigne
7. Deryck Whibley and Paris Hilton
Remember when the two were dating and she appeared in the Me First Gimme Gimme's video for "I Believe I Can Fly"? That was weird. Not as weird as the batshit
crazy guy that wrote "I Believe I Can Fly." That guy fucks kids.
8. Nick Carter and Paris Hilton
Whenever I hear "I beat that bitch with a hit" by Miss Kittin I think of these two.
9. Madonna and Vanilla Ice
Madonna is a fucking stuck up bitch. Why? She’s now religious. She wasn’t religious when she let Vanilla Ice put it in. If you’d like to see Vanilla Ice put it in Madge, check out her book “Sex.” Then tell your gay friends you hate Madonna.
10. Jack White and Meg White
This kid would write great blues songs but won't be able to speak more than thirty words in a day. We'll call him the new Jandek.

Top 10 Bands I Want To See Explode In A Bus Accident and Why
I realize that it's probably insensitive to print this list considering that the drummer from Bayside just died in a car or van or bus accident while on tour. But the band sucked. Fuck that dead drummer. He was 30 anyway. Why the fuck did he make music that sounded like a group of 14-year olds from an affluent suburb?
1. Avenge Sevenfold
untalented assholes
2. The Darkness
cocky assholes
3. Good Charlotte
obvious reasons
4. Yellowcard
fuck that fiddler
5. The Explosion
irony
6. Death Cab For Cutie
irony
7. P.O.D.
God ain't saving anybody
8. Korn
they've had their fun and now they need to die
9. Pussycat Dolls
strip, don't "sing"
10. Bayside
time to finish the job

I am not the DJ, I am not what I play

Just because one thing goes wrong should not turn my night into a downward spiral. I've had over five hours to figure out something to do. Anything to do. But I am doing nothing. I'm fucking around with a toy guitar. I'm trying to get cameras to work again. I'm getting depressed about being in the same room I lived in for two years of high school.




My mother is making a cake or something. There is nothing inherently wrong with her baking on a Saturday night. There is something wrong because I am here, doing nothing while she makes a cake.

I've spent the majority of my day editing my iTunes account. The program is addicting.

Rather than read any of the six books I've already started I decided to start another book. "Rotten" by John Lydon is a good read thus far. Much better than the John McCain autobiography that I am also reading. For some reason I'm more interested in British punks than war heroes. (I decided I will not use spell check on this post. I'm not sure if I've spelled anything incorrectly but I probably have, so now you know why.)

Maybe I can find somewhere to get coffee. For those of you that don't know, not all of cook county is smoke free, at least not yet. If I think of a diner open within 4 blocks from here I'm going. If not, fuck it. I'll watch "The Munsters" or something.

Daniel Knox posted some new recordings on myspace. Though my connection is less than decent I was able to download one. It was very good and I suggest you spend twenty minutes of your next week giving the guy a shot. If you've already tried to like him but can't, well, we're just different people.

...

Head of Femur just came on my playlist. They played Intonation last summer. They stayed at the grounds longer than any other band. The lead singer was with his girlfriend the entire time. I know his girlfriend from DePaul. We've had over 20 conversations in the last four and a half years. I have no idea what her name is. This will bother me until I sleep.

---

Times like this I wish I had a cell phone.

Part 3

Top 10 Nirvana Songs
1. "Serve the Servants" from "In Utero"
When I really got into this song I quit football. When Kurt Cobain really got into this song he killed himself. When Gavin Rossdale really got into this song he hired Steve Albini to produce "Razorblade Suitcase" and proceeded to disappear from music but become a famous husband. I still have a bigger rack than his wife.
2. "You Know You're Right" from "Nirvana"
This song was leaked in the fall of 2002. I put a link to it on my band's web page. I listened to it on repeat for hours at a time. That's a little odd.
3. "Polly" from "Nevermind"
This song appeas on four of the bands albums. If you count the box set, it's on more. Good for them. Revisiting a song about rape and torture has to be good for the soul.
4. "Verse Chorus Verse"
5. "Frances Farmer Will Have Her Revenge on Seattle" from "In Utero"
One of my favorite songs and titles, but not my number one. That goes to "I Hate Myself And Want To Die." His suicide was such a shock. There were absolutely no clues.
6. "Do Re Mi"
The best reason to pick up the bands box set. Falsetto fun!
7. "D7"
8. "School"
On the "From the Muddy Banks of the Wishkah" version it sounds like he sings "You're in med school again!" instead of "You're in high school again!" Did Kurt aspire to be a doctor? Probably not. Did he aspire to blow his head off with a shotgun? Hell yea!
9. "Love Buzz"
10. "Drain You"

Part 2

Top 10 Videos of 2005
1. Jack Johnson "Sitting Wishing Waiting"
The more I listen to this extremely relaxed (high) singer/songwriter, the more I like him. I make no apologies. He makes me smile.
2. The White Stripes "The Denial Twist"
Conan is in this video! He is big and small and square and round! KRAZY!
3. Beck "Girl"
4. Ok Go "A Million Ways"
They made it in their back yard. Good for them.
5. The White Stripes "My Doobell"
6. The Bravery "An Honest Mistake"
7. R. Kelly "Trapped in the Closet"
Fucking crazy. He's so fucking crazy. He fucks kids, sings as a midget and has a director's commentary on his urban opera. He fucks kids. I bet the kids are crazy too. Crazy. Bat shit crazy.
8. System of a Down "Mezmorize"
9. Interpol "Evil"
Puppets. Evil puppets? Get it? Whatever. Carlos D is on a lot of blow.
10. Eels "Going Fetal"
It's got a howling dog, a gravestone and a guy with a beard. It's sorta like heaven.

It has to be here

Issue 19 of Foul was going to consists of music lists. As time passes each list becomes outdated. Therefore, I am going to post most, if not all of that issue, here. So, here is my list of albums released in 2005 that are better than the Foo Fighters "In Your Honor."

Top 73 Albums of 2005 Better Than Foo Fighters "In Your Honor"
1. Sally "The Attrition E.P."
2. Sufjan Stevens "Illinois"
3. Kanye West "Late Registration"
4. Dangerdoom "The Mouse and the Mask"
5. Sage Francis "A Healthy Distrust"
6. Sleater-Kinney "The Woods"
7. The White Stripes "Get Behind Me Satan"
8. Against Me! "Searching for a Former Clarity"
9. Eels "Blinking Lights and Other Revelations"
10. M.I.A. "Arular"
11. Various Artists "Stubbs the Zombie Soundtrack"
12. M83 "Before the Dawn Heals Us"
13. HorrorPops "Bring It On!"
14. New Black "Time Attack"
15. Fionna Apple "Extraordinary Machine"
16. Common "Be"
17. System of a Down "Mezmerize" and "Hypnotize"
18. Jimmy Eat World "Stay On My Side Tonight"
19. The White Stripes "Walking With A Ghost"
20. Gogol Bordello "Gypsy Punks Underdog World Strike"
21. Moby "Hotel"
22. Spoon "Gimme Fiction"
23. Canasta "We Were Set Up"
24. Feist "Let It Die"
25. Andrew Bird "Andrew Bird and the Mysterious Production of Eggs"
26. Queens of the Stone Age "Lullabyes to Paralyze"
27. Flunk "Morning Star"
28. Chad VanGaalen "Infiniheart"
29. Nine Inch Nails "With_Teeth"
30. Coldplay "XY"
31. The Life and Times "Suburban Hymns"
32. Beck "Guero"
33. The Go! Team "Thunder, Lightning, Strike"
34. New Pornographers "Twin Cinema"
35. The Mars Volta "Frances the Mute"
36. Detroit Cobras "Baby"
37. Pelican "The Fire in Our Throats Will Beckon the Thaw"
38. Laura Veirs "Years of Meteors"
39. Annie "Anniemal"
40. Broadcast "Tender Buttons"
41. The Game "The Documentary"
42. Minus the Bear "Menos el Oso"
43. Franz Ferdinand "You Could Have It So Much Better"
44. Isobella "Surrogate Emotions of the Silverscreen"
45. Wilco "Kicking Television: Live In Chicago"
46. Alkaline Trio "Crimson"
47. Coheed and Cambria "LONG TITLE"
48. Stereophonics "Language, Violence, Sex, Other?"
49. High on Fire "Blessed Black Wings"
50. Pennywise "The Fuse"
51. Broken Social Scene "Broken Social Scene"
52. Rogue Wave "Descended Like Vultures"
53. Various Artists "This Bird Has Flown"
54. Low "The Great Destroyer"
55. Bettye LaVette "I've Got My Own Hell to Raise"
56. Blackalicious "The Craft"
57. Neil Diamond "12 Songs"
58. Morcheeba "The Antidote"
59. LCD Soundsystem "LCD Soundsystem"
60. Wolf Parade "Apologies to the Queen Mary"
61. Various Artists "For A Decade of Sin: 11 Years of Bloodshot Records"
62. Billy Corgan "The Future Embrace"
63. Ryan Adams "Cold Roses"
64. Hail Social "Hail Social"
65. Bright Eyes "I'm Wide Awake It's Morning"
66. ...And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead "Worlds Apart"
67. Sigur Ros "Takk"
68. The Decembrists "Picaresque"
69. Bloc Party "Silent Alarm"
70. Moon "Flightlogs"
71. Gorillaz "Demon Days"
72. Garbage "Bleed Like Me"
73. Harvey Danger "Little By Little"

What a read!

When I die around the age of thirty I would like every obituary to mention heavy drug use. I don't care if I die from cancer, a car accident or drug use, I just want to make sure everyone thinks they're right when they think I died of drug use.

I was lucky enough to perform on Friday night's Around the Coyote self-publishers event. I disappointed myself. I didn't go in with high expectations, but going third out of thirteen gave me a lot of time to think about what I should have done. Oh well, can't live in the past. Then again, most zines are about the recent past written by people that shouldn't, therefore I am qualified to live in the past.

I read a piece about how I want to have sex with celebrities. My mother got a hold of it as I was leaving. She cried. It was bad. Since I don't think I'll ever put it in The Machine or Foul and I definitly won't try to sell it I might as well post the thing here.

"The Following Words Made My Mother Cry and Blew Any Chance I Had with Tina Fey"
by Brandon Wetherbee

Like most people in their twenties I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want to do for a career. I thought I wanted to be a writer. Put ideas down on paper and get paid for it. It sounded like a good idea. I don’t want to be a writer. In fact, I don’t really want to do anything. Pat O’Brien taught me this. The former host of “Access Hollywood” and current host of “The Insider” taught me a valuable lesson. Everyone wants to do nothing. Win the lottery and fuck celebrities. Just like Pat O’Brien, every non-retard just wants to do a lot of blow and “get crazy with you (you being a celebrity) and some hooker.”

Any human being that is worth anything does not want to work. People that get degrees in business just want to make enough money to be in a certain social standing, a social standing that will allow them to meet celebrities that they will have the opportunity to fuck.

No one really aspires to be a construction worker, police officer or soldier. I’m not saying that people that are construction workers, police officers or soldiers don’t like their work. I’m saying that those people do their work because it’s the opportunity that presented itself. Unless they’re unstable, no one would willingly want to shoot at brown people. How do I know this? Ask any blue collar worker if they would rather do their job or fuck someone that starred in a late-night Showtime movie and anyone would half a libido would choose to risk an STD over an honest days work.

Religious people also want to fuck celebrities. They become priests, nuns and other celibate figureheads because they don’t think they have a shot with celebrities on earth. But they do believe in heaven and it’s a good bet that their vision of heaven includes orgasms every 10-minutes with some famous saint or child actor.

Pat O’Brien and I have nothing against loving relationships. We’ve both had our share of long-term commitments to individuals we loved. But that kind of relationship has too many demands. Honesty, loyalty, openness. It’s all too much. Purely sexual relationships with starlets do not require much work. If you have enough cocaine and information that could destroy someone, you can fill their holes with your caulking gun for years to come.

Like Pat O’Brien, I’ve been drinking a lot. Unlike the guy with the moustache, I have yet to go on “Dr.Phil” to discuss my problem. I understand that it’s not really a problem, especially when compared to people killing others over a cartoon. I understand that I’m not a unique voice. At one point in time I attached myself to causes and hung out with people that read CrimeThink books. It was a good time but it wasn’t really me. I don’t care about migrant workers rights. I don’t care about voter fraud. I don’t care about most of the causes my friends and enemies protest about. I only care about getting drunk enough so whoever I happen to fuck looks like Lindsey Lohan, Rachel Weisz, Kelly Clarkson and/or Tina Fey.

When I begin my quest to infiltrate Hollywood I’ll be able to drink every night for free. No one in Hollywood pays for drinks. It’s the law. I might also have a chance of actually meeting something (I refer to the celebrities as things, not as people for a reason, don’t ruin the illusion) I’ve fantasized about.

I want to get Kelly Osbourne pregnant and force her into marriage. I would be married into the Osbourne’s and have a say in how Ozzy’s catalogue would be licensed.

I want to expose Lindsey Lohan as a cokehead. Maybe this admission will force her into eating again and she’ll regain her once decent breasts.

I want to have one-night stands with every rising female star in Hollywood. I want to make them realize how shallow their lives are and commit mass suicide. Why? It’ll make people in third world countries feel better about themselves. Maybe I do care about causes after all.

Please don’t ask what I’ll do once I no longer am able to have sex for celebrities. If you ask me this question you are dumb. I will do what every washed up hanger on and write tell-all books. I’ll guest star in Lifetime movies. I’ll tell young females from the Midwest that I’m a producer. In other words, I’ll always have sex with celebrities, I’m white, I’m the devil.

I’m a horrible, horrible human being. I know this. There is no but. There is absolutely no reason why anyone should even look at my in the eye. I’m fine with that. I’m white. I’m a male. I’m somewhat educated. No matter what you think of me, I still have a chance. Those with vaginas and non-Caucasian skin are screwed. They may want to fuck every celebrity featured on E!, but I’m the only one that has a shot. Unless you’re an African-American male. I know a lot of females that only fuck black guys because they hate daddy. I’m sure it’s no different for the famous.

Halsted

6. "Dolly: My Life and Other Unfinished Business" by Dolly Parton
5. "A Confederacy of Dunces" by John Kennedy Toole

The site is mostly done. I finished two books. I'm DJing tonight. Blah. Sorry it's not better.

I've watched too much Martha Stewart (sp?)

It seems to be getting more and more depressing. Things that should take a week are going on a month. People that said they'd do something are just disappearing. Oh well.

The next few days look to be somewhat interesting. I do my radio show tomorrow night. Eric, Kelsey and I DJ for the first time at Town Hall Pub on Thursday night. Friday night is the Around the Coyote festival (I'll be reading about the desire to fuck celebrities). Saturday is Underground Lounge. Busy kids are happy kids.

Progress

The MP3 page on the new site is done and looks much better. So does the internship page, the about section and the main page. Should be up soon.

DJ tonight. Killing self.

New site

Thanks to Alan at fallofautumn.com, themachinemedia.com will look different very soon. The site looks better, it's easy to update and easy to navigate. Rejoice!

I want to see the new "Curious George" movie.

I forgot

4. "Ring of Fire a Tribute to Johnny Cash" by Brian Mansfield

The book came with the set of 16 CDs of Johnny Cash reading the New Testament. It's more of a coffee table book than a tribute, but I read it so I'm counting it.

Lakeview

Things aren't self-destructing, but they're not everything I'd hoped they'd be.

Around 250 people came to the Double Door show, a pretty good number on a Wednesday night against Pelican, Feist and Jeff Tweedy. But before we even played a note, about 50 were still there. The recording didn't work and I broke my guitar. But things could have gone a lot worse.

25 people came to Underground Lounge last night. With little promotion and our first time there that also isn't so bad. But the bar had no regulars of its own and our friends came at different times, always making the place look sparsely attended. Drinks were not free, drinks were overpriced and we didn't get paid at the end of the night. We also had to provide our own needles. We won't be there much longer.

Things could be worse. It just gets harder to keep saying things could be worse.

Busy kids are happy kids

Kelsey and I spun records at Danny's last night. We sucked. We did help the bartenders clear tables at the end of the night so we should be back.

I'm about to leave to attend a meet and great for the DePaul New Venture Challenge. It's a good bet that I'll be the only one in jeans with a failed beard.

Double Door tomorrow.

Underground Lounge Thursday.

Hungry Brain Friday.

Recording Saturday.

Mass suicide Sunday.

Off Monday.

Off Tuesday.

Off Wednesday.

Rise from dead, Liar's Club Thursday.

Living

Martha Stewart is better than you. She's rich as hell, has street cred and can do everything better than you. Don't get a big head because she'll kick your fucking ass.

I want to move away from everyone and buy a tractor

It seems to be a pretty shitty month for Chicago music. First the home of gospel music burned down, Lou Rawls died and the former home of Red Line Radio has been demolished.

Red Line Radio was (maybe is, I'm not sure) a pirate radio station run out of Rogers Park. It had a free form schedule and let anyone who was willing to show up every week DJ. The former home was in the projection room of the Adelphi Theater. It was dirty, scary and altogether exciting.

Oh well.

I am the DJ, I am what I play

I'll take any excuse to quote David Bowie.

It seems that The Machine is turning less into a magazine and more into a party promoter. Didn't see that coming.

The Machine is spinning at Liar's Club, Delilah's, Underground Lounge and Town Hall Pub in Feb. We've also got Double Door and Danny's in Jan. It's great because we're not real DJs, we just spin Chicago music.

The next week should be a productive one for us. Three shows and progress in our DePaul Venture Project (more on this later).

David Bowie got a sucker thrown at him. It got stuck in his eye.

I'd like to use a word I feel wrong using

3. "The Wu-Tang Manual" by the RZA

The RZA is awesome. I want to be friends with the RZA. The Wu-Tang book is much, much better than the Manson book. Manson, you left me down. RZA, you are the man.

The manual covers a lot of ground. You learn about the groups fascination in kung-fu, the equipment RZA uses producing, what certain lines in certain songs actually mean, how and why you should dress like Wu-Tang, and my personal favorite, how RZA figured out how to get four major labels all working for the same group. The man knows his shit.

But if I met him, I'd probably tell how I'm shocked that he speaks so well. I like to see if they get the joke.

I'm watching the SNL that System of a Down played on. The first broadcast didn't bleep out fuck. Let's see if E! catches the error.

Coma White

2. "The Long Hard Road Out of Hell" by Marilyn Manson with Neil Strauss

It was disappointing. The Antichrist Superstar helped me remember a girlfriend I had in Freshman year of high school. We didn't kiss once. The last day we hung out was odd. I decided to leave and on the way out I saw her mounted on some 18-year old. We were 14. I bought her a candle from Spencer gifts for Christmas. It was what she asked for. The cover of Marilyn Manson's "Antichrist Superstar" was on it. She got me a Nirvana shirt.

Mike should update his blog more often

Last year's goal was to keep track of every band I saw. I did this until June or July. Because I didn't tell anyone about it I think I figured that the experiment was a waste of time. This year's goal is to read at least 52 books. I've read one so far.

1. "Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic and Madness at the Fair that Changed America" by Erik Larson

It was good.

It's hard to listen to the radio station that I work at.

Pump Up the Volume

My show is almost over. I've been playing CDs that have been in my office for at least six months. I've never really listened to them. I like about 75% of what I've played. I think that's a good average.

9-year olds should not be allowed to use AIM. It's fucking creepy.

Twin Wrecks the Memory is a great band. Their music is good, which is always important, but they're great people to boot. I hope I wake up in time to go to their video shoot.

High Fidelity clerks

The cat was playing with the Reckless Records bag. It's a little after two in the afternoon. I've gotten out of bed to pee and to get my computer. The cat has had a more productive day.

The worlds only rock and roll talk show

Sound Opinions is a talk show about rock and roll. It's hosted by Jim Derogotis (Chicago Sun-Times) and Greg Kot (Chicago Tribune). The show used to be on WXRT but now it's on Chicago Public Radio. I was allowed to go in and interview the band a few years back. It was a learning experience. I liked Greg Kot, I thought Jim Derogotis is a dick. I'm listening to the show from last week and I still think Jim Derogotis is a dick. He's interviewing the singer from the Strokes who also sounds like a dick. The whole thing makes me weary of both radio and rock and roll.

The more I listen to this the more I hate Jim Derogotis. He asks "artists" softball questions and once they're out of the room he makes fun of them. He'll kiss ass for thirty minutes and then make it sound like they were kissing his ass for thirty minutes.

I saw him eat ham out of a deli package. It was right out of "Tommy Boy."

Greg Kot is a really nice guy. He knows his shit and listens when you talk. If every critic was like Kot, the music world would be a better place.

Rise Against put it in their newest video

Why is there always a description of mountains during NPR's Story of the Day? Is it really that important?

When the story is about an elderly subject, why does music from the decade of their birth have to be played in the background? They probably didn't listen to that music for the majority of their life. All music beds should consist of Judas Priest, crows screaming and babies swearing.

It is nice to know that when one half of an elderly couple dies their partner soon follows. Not because it's romantic, because only the good die young and the older you are, the more evil you are.

---

Alicia, Kelsey and I went to the Fireside last night to see Egon Strangler, Beard and Doug Travis. Egon Strangler was a good, straight forward punk three-piece. Beard is another three piece, but instead of guitar, they have a violin player. Excellent band. Doug Travis, Billy and CT's band, played last and delivered an entralling set. Billy, the band's singer, started as a pregnant clown with a bright red curly wig. By the end of the set, he had given birth, lost his breasts and hair, destroyed four monkeys and spit on his band. Doug Travis put on a good show.

It was great to see a punk band at the Fireside. It's been almost a year and a half since they stopped having regular shows and it has made the city a little more boring. Hopefully there will be more shows like last night.

Jesus, I can't write.

Me: "I LIKE STUFF!!! YAY!!! PEOPLE PEOPLE THING!!!"

Smiling, happy people

There's a new ad campaign in the Clark/Lake CTA stop. It features children smiling and playing. No business attached. I don't trust it. Not at all.

I did not use spell chek on this post

At age 54, Wonder Woman is looking pretty good. I'm watching a made for TV movie on WE called "Family Blessings." The 1996 'film' has Lynda Carter playing a widowed mother of two kids. One of her children died a few years ago and now she's romantically involved with her dead son's best friend. It's a horrible movie, but I'm watching because Lynda Carter also looked pretty good at 45. (To show how lazy my brain has become, let me show you the behind-the-scenes of this blog post. Rather than subtract 96 (the year of "Family Blessings") from 51 (the year of Carter's birthday), I used the calculator on the computer. When typing the word calculator, I looked at the start menu to see if it was spelled with an or or an er.)

---

Check out fallofautumn.com if you have the time. It's a neat site and has some zinesters I know doing podcasts. They call up, read their piece and the guys that run the site turn it into a podcast. It's a great idea and a pretty cool reality. It's just a little odd hearing people I know talk on the phone to no one in particular. It's not as creepy as Pat O'Brien's lewd phone calls, but disturbing none the less (Should none the less be written as one word? I should know this, or at least get up and look in a dictionary. Hell, I'm so lazy I choose not to use spell check or dictionary.com).

---

I've been watching this shitty movie for almost an hour. I'm entralled and on the verge of suicide.

---

I got a chance to talk to Billy Roberts, the guy in the bunny suit, last night at the Mojoe's reading. He told me that he's interested in getting back into the swing of things. That news makes me happy. Billy is one of the few people I know that makes every experience more interesting. His band Doug Travis is playing the Fireside tonight. I'm going to go. What would I do if I didn't run into Billy? Sit home in Oak Park and feel sorry for myself.

Go to loopdistro.com, IKnowBilly.com or Uncle Fun toy store and say hello.

---

I think Lynda Carter and the younger guy are going to get married. I would marry Wonder Woman.

I wonder how much coke was done on the set of "Family Blessings."

They just made a semi-racist joke. Some guy adopted a black kid. "You're just going to have to get used to country music instead of rap." How do you know the kid even likes rap? Just because he's got gold chains, 2 guns, 3 gold teeth and 4 kids at the age of 13 doesn't make him a rap fan.

Still Alive

More on this later.

I'm Not A Child

The phrase "we'll see" makes me upset every time I hear it. It reminds me of what it was like to be a child and asking an adult to do something that they did not really want to do.

"Can we get ice cream after we run the errands?"
"We'll see."

I hated hearing that even as a child. Now that I'm technically an adult I want to break a chair over whoever utters those words to me.

"How's the job going?"
"It's pretty stressful. I'm not sure if I want to be there. I might leave. We'll see."

No, we won't see. We won't see because if you keep saying "we'll see" I'm going to hurt you and cut all ties.

Better Living Through Technology

I'm pretty sure the CD drive on the laptop I'm using is broke. The thing is brand new. The CD drive in the computer that's almost 8-years old works perfectly fine. I guess things were better back in the day.

Grindstone

The Machine is actually making progress! Hooray! All in the land of gears is celebrating.

The Electric Six album that comes out in Feb. is very good. Full of dance music, lyrics that don't make sense or have a point and a tour that stops at Double Door makes me like the band.

If all goes as planned, The Machine will give you at least four things per month to attend. Two or more bars where we DJ, a few bands and maybe a party.

A band is practicing downstairs. It sounds like static, a jackhammer and an Iron Maiden 33 played at 45 speed on a Fischer Price record player. They are also smoking weed. I know this because the office smells like weed. I do not smoke. The scent is coming from the vents.

God damn

I did not get the job. There is no progress to report for The Machine. I did drink from 6 pm to 3 am. All but one drink was free. I guess that's good.

I'm depressing you. Fuck off. Go read pitchfork or livejournal or something.

Music to listen to

I'm DJing at Delilah's tonight. I have nothing else to do.

Saturday's All-Right For Fighting

People need to have snow ball fights. It's good for the soul.

After spending the last 24-hours within a 2-block radius, I needed to go out. I was scheduled to review a show at SubT on Friday night but couldn't due to an extremely painful tooth pain. I was scheduled to read at a monthly event at Mojoe's but didn't due to poor scheduling. I sat around all day with no plans to leave. Around 6 p.m., I decided to get the hell out of Oak Park. Since I hadn't showered in a few days and smelled like smoke, fat and Krispy Kreme doughnuts, I figured I should wash up. So I did. I got on the el around 8 p.m. and got to Mojoe's during the last reading. Oh well. I would have read to the same 8 people I always read to.

Chicago hasn't been hit hard by snow, but today was pretty bad. Since it's been a light season, the snow tonight was great. It was a steady stream but not enough to make driving or walking that difficult. There was enough snow to make the city look like a dream but not enough to keep people indoors.

Following the reading was a trip to a nearby Mexican restaurant. Eight of us sat at a table. Some tattooed, some with facial hairs, some with glasses, some Vegans, some carnivores. A typical mix of "zinesters." Since the person I was expecting to see wasn't there, I asked Lab Rat if I could tag along with him. He said fine. I had something to do.

Jeff has a car. So the three of us drove. Our first destination was a party on the edge of Boystown. It was not a good party. The place was packed with people that are usually at Lincoln Park parties. People that really don't care what music is on, well dressed, clean, in shape, made up in make up, etc. The kind of people that usually don't enjoy the company of Lab Rat, Jeff and me. A little unkempt is better. So we left. Though I invested $5 for a cup at the party and definitely did not get my money's work of beer, it was imperative that we leave. When Lab Rat told me the news, I went to the bathroom. I made my money back in dental floss and hair dye/hair gel. I got my money's worth.

In the alley on the way to the party was a computer monitor. I tried to smash it. I did smash it. I also fell. It was not as glorious as I had hoped.

The second and final party was in Bucktown. The place was about a fifth of the size as the first apartment. The stairs were uneven, the floor slanted and 3-people lived in a place the size of a normal studio apartment. It didn't matter. The party was great. Only 20 or so people were there. It didn't matter. 5 girls, 10-15 guys. It didn't matter. People danced, everyone had a snow-ball fight, there was enough alcohol and no one was trying to impress anyone else. Jeff blew a small ball of fire. Lab Rat tried to. It did not happen. To compensate for his failure he put some cap gun ammo on the stove.

Around 3 a.m., the Lab Rat, Jeff and I left to smoke a hookah. Lab Rat and Jeff fucked around on a keyboard, I played some weird 3-string instrument and Lab Rat free styled over some fucked up beats. It's a good time to note that Lab Rat had the most to drink. It was a good time.

Thanks to Jeff for driving me home. Much appreciated.

It was a good night. I visited two places I'll probably never see again, met some interesting people, got some more dental floss and saw people I don't see enough. Now I'm watching "Sealab 2021" and writing this little memory. It wasn't an exciting night, but one that I enjoyed. I played in a snowball fight on someone’s roof in Bucktown. I danced with no one in particular. I drank enough to maintain a buzz and only spent $5. It was a pretty good night.

What I Would Have Read Aloud

The following is what I was going to read at Mojoe's on December 3 2005.

The title is "Dear America."

-I was 5-feet behind three late-20-something females on the way to the el. One would turn her head every five seconds or so. After two blocks, the three stopped to look at an Italian restaurant's menu. They were scared of me. They were not scared to talk to a homeless guy when we shared the same el car.

-Tool makes me wish for the apocalypse.

-People that write to the op-ed section of newspapers should not begin their letter with, "Dear American, I'm fed up..."

-I spent the day listing my top 100 albums, videos and artists of all-time for no reason.

-50 Cent needs to go away. Not die, but release a string of albums that no one buys.

-It sucks that a kid died because he was sledding directly into traffic. It's not a tragedy that the drive of the pickup truck did not stop. It sucks but the kid was asking for it. It's really going to suck on Monday when some paper prints, "Dear America, It's a tragedy that the guy driving that pickup didn't stop."

-I find Kelly Clarkson more attractive with each passing day.

-I have a hole in my tooth that's been bothering me. Yesterday was really bad. I spent an hour and a half trying to pull it out with gloves (I couldn't get a grip without them). Then I spent an hour trying to get it out with a wrench. That didn't work.

-The Kedzie green line stop is my favorite el stop. They let me in after my card wouldn't read. The State/Lake, Clark/Lake, Clinton, Ashland and California stops wouldn't.

-Aborting drug babies isn't going against god. Having drug babies is doing the devil's work.

-If my mom really believes all Jewish people are rich, why didn't she baptize me Jewish?

-I want to have ball cancer, have the cancer ball taken out and recover. No problems, just one ball instead of two. Then I would have a license to kill. And not just kill brown people, but all people. No male jury would convict the guy that had ball cancer.

-If you're riding the el with a friend and the car is crowded, sit with said friend. Don't wear your IPod and talk to each other across the aisle. It makes me want to write a "Dear America" op-ed piece.

-The German language just sounds evil.

-When things are really grim, I take NyQuil.
-I want to marry Rachel Weisz, have an affair with Kelly Clarkson and have David Bowie stalk me. Then, I want Kanye West and Jon Brion to produce the David Bowie album that is about stalking me. Bowie and Clarkson would do a duet and Rachel Weisz would be on the album's cover.
If this happens, 6 months later I'll get ball cancer. Weisz will divorce me, Clarkson won't see me and Bowie will get bored of me so I'll all of them. After being acquitted, I'll publish a book called "Dear America." It'll be a picture book with German captions.

-Chimichanga is a fun word to say.

-Why would anyone buy a commemorative jacket? I.E. "Super Bowl XXVIII"

-My goal as a father is to never have a daughter that refers to her as a cum-bucket, cum-dumpster or any other receptacle prefaced with the word cum.

-Every time I get on a new el car, I look around and decide who will be my lifelong companion if we crash and are trapped for the rest of eternity. I think I found someone on this car. Wait. No. She's reading "People."

Early

It's not 11 p.m. and I'm very tired. This is no good.

Instead of doing work, I'm doing nothing. At least I used to make to-do lists. I haven't done that in a few weeks.

I'll start one tomorrow.

Wait, since I just typed that, isn't that in it of itself a to-do list?

It is. At least I think it is.

Thanks

To everyone that came to the Bottle last night. It was fun.

Staring at a computer screen everyday at work doesn't make me want to update this thing as much as I should.

Funny

The story about the two guys that escaped from prison and posed as Katrina victims is funny. It sucks for the real victims, but it's still funny.

I really have nothing to say

Issue 2 should be online by the beginning of next week. That’s good.

I’ll be DJing at Liar’s Club on December 1, my birthday. Please come. Please do not buy me a drink. I get them for free.

It seems that when I type the word where, the second e usually ends up capitalized. Weird? I don’t know. Insignificant? Yes.

I bought two masks today. One is a snow owl, one is for a mental hospital patient that likes to eat faces. FUN TIMES U.S.A!!!

I’m listening to the new Wilco live album. I’m not sure how I feel about it. It’s kind of boring, but I expected it to be kind of boring.

Traversing

Rather than just sit here and be complacent with the infomercial that is blaring at me, behind me, I will update the entire WORLD of the goings-ons of my life. It will be fantastic.

I visited four bars tonight. I am not drunk, nor have I been drunk because of drinking boooooze tonight.

Delilah's had very few patrons. The DJ played what he wanted. He played Howlin Wolf, The Undertones, Gene Vincent and more music that I like. Max would have liked it. Instead, he is in Europe, probably setting fires. Kelsey and I played pool.

The Empty Bottle show is coming up. YAY! THINGS TO DO!

"Somebody Put Something In My Drink" by the Ramones is a bad song. No ifs, ands or buts about it.

My face will one day be on a t-shirt. It will be a negative portrayel of me. Do not buy such a shirt. Fuck you if you do. In fact, fuck all of you. Why haven't you put me on a t-shirt? You're all so dumb.

Snow

I doubt that it is snowing in Chicago because the people of earth have pissed off God.

Hooray for metal!

Zach Wylde is playing next door. About 10 of Jeremy's friends came over to drink before the show. All of them have on black leather Black Label Society vests. They are all very polite. Yay for metal.

This can't be good

The Vapor Trail Random Brutal Love Master (RBLMm) Here today, gone today. You are The Vapor Trail. Are you in a relationship now? Your exact opposite: The Backrubber Deliberate Gentle Sex Dreamer What about now? Vapor Trails can be highly charismatic people--unpredictable, confident, and magnetic. You're experienced. You know how to handle yourself in a relationship, and many people appreciate that. Many people, all in a row. You've had your share of blissful beginnings, to be sure. But things almost never turn out how you'd like, do they? The problem is you're never happy with someone for an extended period of time. Relate to the following: Vapor Trails especially need a girl who will laugh at their jokes. They're also the most likely male type to be haunted by serious regret. FACT: A few of your exes, the ones you were best to, will always love you. Nice going. ALWAYS AVOID: The Intern, The Maid of Honor CONSIDER: The Sudden Departure Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating. My profile name: foulinc

I want to conquer the world

Mike and I saw Bad Religion. They were good.

I finally have a job interview. Though it's only $10 an hour, it's something. Thanks to everyone who gave me help in what to do. I appreciate it.

Kelsey, Mike, Steve and some guy I know but don't know the name of are drinking in The Machine. It's after 1 am on a Thursday night/Friday morning. "When the Levee Breaks" is on. Ironic?

My heart feels weird.

Summer teeth

I’ve always thought that Corus bank is the low-class of the banks. All the tellers seem to be college dropouts. No one with any real money would ever use it as their sole bank. I used to think that this was one of the reasons I used it as my bank. No longer. I feel like a loser every time I go in there. I have to ask for my balance because I no longer have an ATM card. Then I get my balance. I may have a college degree, but the guy behind the counter has more than $7.40 in his account.

After leaving my bank, I headed over to The Machine. In July, this place was great. As time passed, the place has become a sour reminder of how I’m fucking up. There really isn’t anything I can do, besides get a full-time job, to get this fucker in print. So if anyone knows of anyone who can and will hire me, let me know. If not, well, then the magazine has been printed, you just don’t have one because they flew off shelves (or in this case, floors).

So with no real purpose and not enough money to do much of anything, I’ve decided to head to Pilsen for some photos that need to be taken. After that jaunt, I will travel to Chinatown. Chinatown usually makes me somewhat happy. I have no bad memories associated with the place and the noodle place I always go to is cheap.

But before I leave, I must find some company. It’s this weird desire to spread the wealth of my boredom. I will offer nothing insightful or witty, but I will pay for your meal, so you better come. So for the past hour or so, I’ve been looking for comrades online with no luck. This has led me to myspace. Rather than sit here and feel sorry for myself, I try to add hundreds of “friends” for Fetor. Why? I have no idea why. It gets my mind off of things, at least it used to. I just spent three and half minutes on some 16-year olds page because she was streaming “Me and Mia” by Ted Leo. And that, is fucked up.

I first read “Seize the Day” during the summer of 2001. I didn’t like the book. It didn’t click with me or something. I was forced to re-read it in my junior or senior year at DePaul. It’s now one of my favorite books. I’m starting to understand why Tommy Wilhelm loses his mind. I might not have an ex-wife, kids, money or a father, but I do think I can relate. God damn. Things could be a lot worse. I could have a Corgan sized ego.

Killing

This entire week has been a waste. No job leads, no progress on the magazine, no fun. The only positive is having another song for the band. That isn't a joke.

I'm about to head over to the Brain. Stop by. I'll be standing/sitting near the door til 2. We can share a story and then fight over the relevance of a "Rocky VI" in the year 2005.

Not the Lord's day

Why did we stay out so late? It was a Tuesday for Christ’s sake.

Mike wanted to get out of his house last night. So we did. Like most 22-year olds that want to get out of their house at 10 p.m., he wanted to drink. Fine by me.

The two of us began our adventure with a nice, chilly walk from my mom’s apartment. We arrived at the less than classy Shortstop Lounge 20 minutes later. Though Mike grew up just a few blocks from the saloon, he had never been inside. It was my fifth or so time drinking in Forest Park and it was already my second time at said establishment.

The bar has a unique drink special, $3.50 mason jars of Millet Lite, PBR and MGD. The regulars seem to match the specials, cheap but rewarding. In the three and a half hours spent at the establishment, we saw a young fellow try to steal one (ONE!) bottle of opened beer, a middle-aged man play most of Gwen Stefani’s album “for the ladies” (there were 4 ladies in the entire place) and one of the ladies swear at a video poker machine like a sailor with a love for Dennis Leary.

Mike and I were not done at 2 a.m. We decided to continue our adventure and head northeast to Underbar.

Underbar is a 4 a.m. establishment. It’s not that cheap, but the clientele is somewhat “hip” and we were lucky to have a place to sit. Dan, a bartender at the Hungry Brain, the bar I work at, was there drinking with his pal Mike.

“Mike, this is my friend Mike.”
“Hey, Mike.”
“Mike plays bass.”
“I play treble.”

Clever.

Since no trip to Underbar is complete without a visit to Blue Light, Mike and I went next door to one of the sleaziest bars in the city. Blue Light is the kind of place that caters to people with wandering eyes, poor teeth and low standards. In our 30-minutes there, the bartender threatened to “put you guys in the corner,” heard Cher’s “Believe,” sang along to Cher’s “Believe,” petted a dog to the beat of Cher’s “Believe” and Mike called a friend at 3:49 a.m. asking if she wanted to pick up a “McBeer” with him.

Don’t piss on Underbar. Nothing good ever comes from pissing on Underbar. I’ll leave it at that.

I got home at 4:45 a.m. Mike had work at 9 a.m. in Des Plaines. It was a Tuesday night.

Sabine's blog did this

Leave your name and
1. I'll respond with a celebrity you remind me of.
-kurt cobain or a bum
2. I'll tell you what I really think about you.
-you're an incredibly talented and gifted artist, i wish you'd get a leg up
3. I'll tell you what song you remind me of.
-any nirvana song
4. My favorite memory of you.
-"wanna blow this popsicle stand and get a drink?" turns into drinking boone's farm at 11am. OORRRRR HIM AND MONSTER MAGNET!!
5. I'll tell you what cartoon you remind me of.
-doug

6. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal.

I love this shit and I have no idea why. If you leave a message on the post with your name, I'll do the same.

Same town

Screeching Weasel comes from the same suburbs as I do. Ben Weasel lives in the same town I do, I'm pretty sure down the block.

This seems to be the most boring Halloween yet. It's raining, I'm too old to trick-or-treat, inappropriate to have or go to a party and the day seems to have a negative feel. What the fuck?

The week in review

The past week has been pretty fun, but not full of work.

We got a new printing quote, much better than the last one. Both issues should be out by the Empty Bottle show.

I’m all over the place on this one. I’ll try to start from last Friday.

Friday night was enjoyable, Kelsey, Merle, John and I had dinner at Lincoln Restaurant at a normal dinner hour. From there we went to the Mutiny to see Twin Wrecks the Memory. The group was great and by the time we left Kelsey and I had finally digested our wonderful meal. After hanging out in the Chicago version of CBGBs, we headed over to Pilsen for some party that Jason was at. The party was actually pretty good. I saw Micah (and his dick for the 100th time) and got intoxicated gratis. Since it was only 3 a.m. when we left, we decided to head back up north and stop at UnderBar. Rather than watch two 35-year olds make out outside, we went a few doors over to a different 5 a.m. bar. One drink in, we decided to head out. But we couldn’t find Jason. He had been kicked out for using the women’s bathroom. His cell phone was dead. Dale was pissed. Then Emerson, Jan and Dan from Hungry Brain got there. So we stayed til close. It was a long night.

Saturday wasn’t nearly as exciting, but was still fun. I watched the Sox game at The Machine and did layout work on issue 2. Both should be out (in print) by the Empty Bottle show. We have a month. Once the Sox won, Kelsey and I picked up Merle and John and headed over to the Old Chocolate Factory. Izom, the guys we rent from, were playing and we figured it we should check them out. They were awesome. None of us are big metal fans, but we know a good live act when we see one. They are a good live act. Once the keg was tapped (I realize I sound like a frat boy (Sorry, Mike)) we headed back to the office. John tried to fix Kelsey's computer and the rest of us listened to the Beach Boys, The Cars and M.I.A.

Sunday. Stuff happened Sunday. I don't remember what.

Rather than go to Carol's like we do every Monday night, Kelsey and I decided to try out Bingo at the California Clipper. Sarah and Emerson were there and it was a pleasant evening. We even got a Gwen Stefani poster for the office out of the trip (Thank you, Sarah).

Kelsey, Laura, Brian, Manny, Chris and some guy from Scotland watched the Sox game at Full Shilling, a bar across the street from Wrigley Field until the 10th inning. After not tipping enough (I ran out of $), we left and watched the rest of the game at Kelsey's. She passed out. I watched the longest game in World Series history.

The Sox won the World Series last night. I interviewed Canasta last night. Kelsey and I watched three episodes of "Arrested Development" last night.

I'm currently sitting at Kelsey's desk, trying to finish up a post I began 4-hours ago. Sarah is here, fixing up issue 1.

Post summary: I did stuff, I write like a pre-teen girl who just got back from an awesome mall trip.

Bitch, blog, bitch

This thing is supposed to chronicle what it's like to put out a magazine. Sometimes it does touch upon said subject, sometimes not. The goal of this post is to tie together all the snippets in my life and show how everything in my life is now attached to The Machine.

I'm currently writing this in The Machine office. +

In the past week I've: sent out emails to some writers about deadlines, began layout on issue 2, edited issue 1 to stay current, added Google ads to the site, requested new printing quotes, compiled articles for issue 2, compiled art for issue 2, contacted photographers for shots, scheduled interviews...+

I got drunk on Friday, Saturday and Monday night. -

I did Machine work while drunk on Saturday and night. +

But I still don't have a full-time job, which means I can't print the magazine, which means we won't get ads for future issues. There is the dilemma. Unlike Nelly and Kelly Rowland's dilemma, I will not be able to be a guest on B.E.T.'s 106 and Park.

---

Slipknot is playing the Congress tonight and tomorrow night. The security guards keep trying to get in the office. Fuck Bucktown.

---

Kelsey and I saw "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" last night. It was pretty good. If all goes as planned we'll see "Gunner Palace" tonight. I'm trying to attend one happening a night for free. So far, so good.

---

I've got to get on the Blue Line now. If I wait any longer, I'll lose my transfer.

Zines

I picked up a really cool zine today at the UIC Zine Fest. It's called "Free Advice: regular people tell you what they thing." I started reading it at the UIC/Halsted blue line stop and by the time I hit Wester, I was done. The thing is great. If you ever see it, I recommend picking it up.

I'm only trusting albums that won't let me down. I need "In Utero" and "Of This Blood." They're the only ones that I can understand. I guess that's what happens after you drank too much. It's too late/early to comprehend anything else. But it's what I deserve. At least they're good. Too good. Things that I will not be able to beat. I'll keep trying, but I won't be able to reach what they have.

I keep dropping my cigarette on myself. I'm not sure how much more my pants can take. I'll find out soon.

Sarah is getting married. She's my age. I can't afford to go to her wedding. I'm sorrry Sarah. I wish I could be there. I wish you nothing but the best. I am not ready to get married. God knows I'm not. Not that I believe in god, but I do believe in age old sayings. I also belive in the Beach Boys. If Brian Wilson wrote it, it must be good.

Max and Amy are leaving for new jobs. Good job guys. I will not be leaving. I'm sorry, but I just can't. There is too much here that I need. I hope you understand.

Johnny Cash is a man to look up to because he was more flawed that most of us. He knew what he wanted, but he didn't know how to handle anything. Without the women in his life, he was useless. Drugged up, drunk and unable to perform. I believe that most men feel this way, they just don't know it. I may only be drunk, but I know I'm flawed. I'm not the worst,but I'm certantly not the best.

The Chicago Public School system is fucking me up more than anything else. I didn't even go to a Chicago public school, but I know the damage they're inflicting. Racism does exist, just not how you picture it.

Whatever I write here won't get out to the people that need to read it. Professionals don't read blogs. Only people who name check do. I can't judge. If a blog doesn't have Brandon or Wetherbee written anywhere in it, I usually don't read it. Unless it's a friend or a good writer, it's useless. Therefore, most blogs are useless. This one is.

I'm going to go back to listening to Detachment Kit's "Of This Blood."

Say You'll Be There"

Take the quiz: "Which'>http://www.zenhex.com/quiz.php?id=5012">"Which Spice Girl Are You?"

Posh spice (Victoria)
You my friend are most like posh spice. youre sophisticated, fun loving, and a really nice person (deapite what people may think). you love to hang out and have fun and you always look good. some people think youre just a rich snob, but youre actually a nice, fun person!

Pain repeated over and over

When "You Know You're Right" by Nirvana was first linked, I put the link to the mp3 on Fetor's web site. I would listen to the song on repeat for hours at a time. A few years later, I once again have the mp3 of the song. I am listening to the song on repeat. Probably for hours at a time.

We don't have to breed

I’ve spend two hours on the el today. The last 20-minutes were the worst. On a brown line train from the loop, six kids that belonged to Iowa State football fans were running around. The loudest was a 9 or 10 year-old boy that kept making suicide jokes. They weren’t funny. Behind me was a Q101 employee (I know this because her hoodie said “Q101 employee”) bitching to a fellow co-worker about song levels.

I hope the brown line train from the loop derails.

The one where Young has devil horns

The Machine office has about 100 cds and 100 records. Whenever I don’t know what I want to listen to, I put on AC/DC’s “Highway To Hell.”

AC/DC is possibly the only band that sounds better to me every time I hear them. Sure, I haven’t liked anything they’ve put out since 1990, but it doesn’t matter. The entire Bon Scott era is damn near perfect and the first 10-years of Brian Johnson was good too.

I don’t like AC/DC because they sing about sex, drugs and rock and roll. I don’t like AC/DC for their Australian take on the blues. I don’t like AC/DC because of Angus Young’s guitar solos. I love AC/DC because their music matches their subject matter. Led Zeppelin’s music does not match their lyrical content. I don’t think of Frodo when I hear them, even though Mr. Plant is singing about him. Black Sabbath sang about evil shit, but their music wasn’t evil enough for me. “Fat Bottom Girls” by Queen is the best example of music and lyrics that just don’t fit. I’m sorry Mr. Mercury, but all songs about ass should be bass heavy.

AC/DC has released some of my favorite music of all time. I’ll listen to it alone, at a party, in a bar, during service, at a funeral…it doesn’t matter, because if I want blood, I got it.

Site work

I'm pretty much done with the basic design for the radio, events and about page on The Machine site. They're not good, but they're something.

It's now time to get back to harassing businesses for ads. Always fun.

I ain't got nobody

In the last dream I had last night, there was a song in my head. I had never heard the song before. Therefore, it was my song. It was awesome. When I woke up, I could no longer remember how the song sounds. Instead, “Just a Gigolo” was in my head. Fuck you David Lee Roth.

Best soundtrack of the year

The soundtrack for the video game Stubbs the Zombie is awesome. 13 bands covering classic pop songs. Awesome. I might now be a fan of Death Cab for Cutie. I love this soundtrack. I am impressed by this soundtrack. Good job Shout Factory.

I'm really glad that I don't have to turn this into an album review. I'd rather gush about the album.

The more you know

What is on the loveseat? It is cocaine.

When the guy that was sitting on the seat got up, he looked down at the seat, swore a lot, then walked away. It was delightful.

Step Two

The moral of this picture is if you hang out after a show, you will get a photo with a member of the band. In this case, the only member of the band that I wanted to meet.

Step One

The Dandy Warhols at CBGB. This is my first of two touristy pictures that involve the band.

Pointless

I just realized that it doesn't matter how many posts I make today, the Lincoln photo will still be there. Honest Abe is haunting me.

To Do

I find myself making to do lists whenever I'm at a bar. It's not that I'm having a bad time or want to avoid interaction with other people. I just feel compelled to write down a list of everything I need to do. It's odd, but not that odd. I'm sure that other people are like this. If they aren't, everyone but me is lazy. Assholes.

"Stay On My Side Tonight"

The new Jimmy Eat World EP is really good. I'm shocked by how much I like it. Good job JEW.

Reviewing CDs

When you work at a radio station, you review a lot of CDs. So far today, I've reviewed the new Neil Young, Atmosphere, Matt Pond PA, The Fall and The Juliana Theory. The Juliana Theory sucks ass. They don't deserve anything but pain that will make them stop playing instruments. Horrible. God awful.

Reason

The reason why I'm posting so much today is so that the Lincoln photo will leave the front page. Once it does, the links and profile will come back to the top. Then I will post what I wrote at CMJ. That's one reason.

I wrote this on an envelope at the Hungry Brain last night

Museums in the future will just be a collection of hard drives.

The White Stripes

Matt really hates The White Stripes. So I'm making him listen to an entire concert. Ha.